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Wednesday 18 September 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, at a family party, my uncles were complimenting my mom on her pies. I cooked them. She took all the credit. FML

#20883979
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41294) - you deserved it (3226)

On 09/16/2013 at 5:03pm - misc - by zachadams - United States (New York)

Today, the creepy kid on the bus saved me a seat again. Thinking he wanted to be friends, I followed him on twitter. He was doing a live video feed so I checked it out. It was of me. FML

Today, I took my girlfriend out to eat at a diner where my friend works. My friend was our waiter but too busy to talk much. He texted me after we'd left to tell me that my girlfriend had slipped him her number. FML

#20894038
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51582) - you deserved it (3179)

On 09/24/2013 at 3:15am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I realized that my grandma has pictures of all her grandchildren all over her house, with one glaring exception: me. FML

Today, I sent a student to the dean for trying to smoke pot in my class. His mother called to complain that I publicly humiliated her son. FML

Today, I went to work at my job as a secretary. I had been given the task to file my boss's collection of Playboy magazines alphabetically by name of the centerfold. There was one for every month from the years of 1980 until now. FML

#20895973
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35794) - you deserved it (3107)

On 09/25/2013 at 7:22pm - work - by Abcporn (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I had to explain to my brother why it's not OK to stick his knob in the toaster. FML

#20893446
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40498) - you deserved it (3105)

On 09/23/2013 at 8:05pm - kids - by latter - United States (Maryland)

Today, after being stood up at a diner, I called the girl who was supposed to have met me. Turns out, she thought I was kidding when I asked her out. FML

#20893951
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44056) - you deserved it (3080)

On 09/24/2013 at 1:16am - love - by Anonymous -

Today, the boy who loved me and left me literally became the poster boy for my college. His picture is on the home page of the college website and on a banner in the cafeteria where I eat every day. FML

#20893327
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40274) - you deserved it (3073)

On 09/23/2013 at 6:38pm - love - by justonce (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I took my girlfriend home to meet my parents. My dad was having a bad day and was rude from the outset, but things went to total hell when he started screaming that he'd "kill" our microwave if it didn't "shut the hell up". My girlfriend now thinks we're a family of abusive psychos. FML

#20887758
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40305) - you deserved it (3064)

On 09/19/2013 at 1:32pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it's my wedding day. Almost a year ago I was in a terrible car accident that nearly left me paralyzed, but I worked my ass off to be able to walk down the aisle. After a lot of blood, sweat, and tears I made it to the big day... and woke up with food poisoning. FML

#20883990
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66864) - you deserved it (3052)

On 09/16/2013 at 5:11pm - health - by somethingblue - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I helped my brother propose to his girlfriend of 5 years in the spot where they had first met. As he delivered his heartfelt speech, a sizable crowd appeared. When he got down on one knee, she punched him in the gut, yelled, "I never loved you", and ran away. Now he won't talk to me. FML

#20887080
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48507) - you deserved it (3052)

On 09/18/2013 at 9:45pm - love - by ElizaZee (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was let down for a movie date. As I'd already paid for the tickets, I got my narcoleptic sister to come and sit next to me while she slept, so it didn't look like I came on my own. FML

#20895886
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32016) - you deserved it (3019)

On 09/25/2013 at 6:12pm - love - by cinemasaddo (man) - United Kingdom



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