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YESTERDAY, I OVERHERED MAH BOYFRIEND TELLING HIS BUDDIES THAT THE MAIN REASON HE GOT INTO VIDEO GAME MODDING WAS SO HE COULD PUT A VRTUAL VERSION OF ME IN HIS GAMES AN "SHOOT THE FUCK OUT OF THAT BITCH". FML
TODAY, I WAS SMALL TALKING WITH AN ELDERLY MAN, WHO TOLD ME THAT NOBODY CARES ABOUT HIM. EVEN THOUGH I HAD ONLY KNOWN HIM 4 AN HOUR, TO TRY AND MAKE HIM FEEL A LITTLE BETTER I TOLD HIM I CARE ABOUT HIM. HE THEN CALLD ME A CREEP, STOMPD HIS CANE ONTO FOOT, AND WALKD OFF. FML
Today, I Summoned Te Courage To Call My Abusive Moter-in-law About Er Non-payment Of Te Money I Stupidly Lent Er Last Year. Se Replied, ( Wy Don't You Go Deeptroat A Cactus, Ten We'll Talk About It, Cunt. ) An Ten Ung Up On Me. FML
Today , my husband tried to annoy me by slurping on his almost-finished drink. I yelled at him to knock it off. Later , our daughter told her class that mommy and daddy had been fighting about his drinking during breakfast. FML
Today, my son had to help out at the local retirement home 4 his community service. He got in serious trouble and came whining to me about it after he tried threatening some of the residents into taking part in a Harlem Shake video. FML
TODAY, MY PREGNANT WIFE PAGD MY EMERGENCY LINE AT WORK . THINKING SHE WAS IN SERIOUS DANGER, I RACD HOME AND FOUND HER HYSTERICALLY CRYING . WHEN I ASKD HER WHAT WAS GOING ON, SHE REPLID, ( THE DOGS WON'T STOP BARKING! ) REAL FML
today mah boyfriend and I got into an argument. Naturally, I drove over to mah best friend's house 4 comfort. My boyfriend saw me driving past his house and promptly broke up with me 4 being ( a psycho stalker. ) She lives acros the street from him. FML
TODAY, I WANTED REVENGE ON MY COLLEGE'S DRINKS MACHINE. FOR THE PAST TWO DAYS, IT FORGOT TO RELEASE A CUP BEFORE POURING MY COFFEE. THIS TIME, I HAD PLANNED AHEAD; I PUTTED MY MONEY IN, ENTERED THE CODE, AND QUICKLY INSERTED MY OWN CUP. IT GAVE ME HOT WATER.
Friday 27 March 2015