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Monday 8 April 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I got the chance to speak to some of the top academics in my field. I was so hungover that I couldn't remember the title of the Masters degree I've spent two years studying for, let alone make intelligent comments. I'm pretty sure the only thing I got right was my name. FML

#20588088
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12474) - you deserved it (96236)

On 04/13/2013 at 1:26pm - misc - by could be an fml commenter - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my laziness hit a new low when I sat on an unopened folding chair to avoid the effort of opening it up. FML

#20587700
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13593) - you deserved it (91635)

On 04/13/2013 at 7:22am - misc - by mets300 - United States (New York)

Today, I forgot to log out of my Facebook account before leaving for work. When I got back home, I discovered that my brother had gone through and commented "quack" on all my friend's duckfacing photos. She was not pleased. FML

#20588155
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26666) - you deserved it (57426)

On 04/13/2013 at 2:07pm - misc - by reallythough - United Kingdom (Oxfordshire)

Today, my boyfriend said he felt like eating icing. So I baked him cupcakes, put icing on them and decorated them. When I handed them to him, he picked off the decoration, licked the icing and handed the cupcake back to me, saying, "I told you that's all I wanted." FML

#20592650
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23120) - you deserved it (46650)

On 04/15/2013 at 1:11am - misc - by Cupcakes (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had a job interview. Everything was going well until I noticed a picture of a dog hanging on the wall, which reminded me of the ending of Marley and Me. I started crying and had to be escorted out. FML

#20585994
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19284) - you deserved it (45587)

On 04/12/2013 at 1:58am - misc - by crybaby (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I realized that my Twitter profile was very public when my business professor made fun of student tweets in class. My tweet went, "Totally bullshitting this business report" about the report I had just handed in, worth a large portion of my grade. FML

#20584642
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11160) - you deserved it (40849)

On 04/11/2013 at 3:49am - work - by imscrewed - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at school, I saw the guy I like at his locker. I decided to run up from behind and surprise him. I ended up accidentally slamming his locker on his fingers. FML

#20587958
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37664) - you deserved it (38672)

On 04/13/2013 at 11:52am - love - by saxophone911 - United States

Today, I just remembered that I changed my Gmail display name to "Rice Ball" out of privacy-paranoia a while back. I've been using this same email to apply to several professional jobs. FML

#20592754
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15053) - you deserved it (34127)

On 04/15/2013 at 1:58am - misc - by geeshock1987 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up with my face covered in blood. Turns out that yesterday at my colleague's birthday party, I got so drunk that I started yelling "Nappy time!" before falling out of my hammock and face-first onto the concrete ground. FML

#20580770
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13265) - you deserved it (33624)

On 04/08/2013 at 3:20pm - misc - by nosey (woman) - United Kingdom (Rhondda Cynon Taff)

Today, it's my birthday. My family put a bouquet of balloons outside my room for me to find when I woke up. I walked out of my room, saw the balloons, screamed, and fell down the stairs. FML

#20587655
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37956) - you deserved it (21816)

On 04/13/2013 at 5:21am - misc - by really? - United States

Today, I dressed up as Batman for a comic book convention. I was hit by a car on the way there by a man dressed up as the Joker for the same convention. FML

#20587443
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57487) - you deserved it (19400)

On 04/13/2013 at 1:04am - misc - by ironies a b*tch - United States (Illinois)

Today, I came home from work to find my son and his friends attempting to find out how many of them could fit into one of my pairs of pants. So far, five. FML

#20583359
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38476) - you deserved it (18620)

On 04/10/2013 at 9:26am - kids - by fatmom (woman) - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, I was supervising some kids, who were playing on a bouncy castle. One of them managed to kick me in the face during a jump, and looking for an apology, I asked, "What do you say?" He paused, then shouted, "HEADSHOTTTTT!" FML

#20587303
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41986) - you deserved it (18349) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/12/2013 at 8:14pm - kids - by xx-look-at-xx - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)



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