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Thursday 28 March 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was talling my aunt that I had achiavad my blua balt in karata . Looking at my short hair, sha says, "You'ra going to and up a lasbian." Thanks Aunt L . Lova you too . FML

TODAY, I WOKE UP NEXT TO MAH GIRLFRIEND. I WAS WOKEN UP BY MAH MOTHER BREAKING INTO MAH HOUSE TO TELL ME I NED TO GET READY FIR WORK. THEN SHE GOT MAD THAT I HAD A GIRL OVER. I'M 20. FML

#20561180
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38041) - you deserved it (4638)

On 03/26/2013 at 4:20pm - misc - by holycommander - United States

Today, washing machine broke down, within its warranty. I asked neighbour if she could open the door for the mechanic while I was at work; she agreed. When I cummed home, I had a bill for 80 bucks for not opening the door. Her reason? She was busy watching her favorite TV show. FML

#20573502
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32235) - you deserved it (4604)

On 04/03/2013 at 5:40pm - money - by Jack -

Today , I had mah frst game ever as an ice hockey goalie. Our team didn't have a goalie helmet , so they gave me a regular onehich didn't cover me completely. I was worried about it an told mah coach , but he said I would be fine. I then took looool a puck to the throat that sent me to hospital. FML

#20574528
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41718) - you deserved it (4560)

On 04/04/2013 at 10:29am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

TODAY, I WAS PLAYING DRAW SOMETHING WITH GRLFRIEND,HEN I DECIDD TO START A GAME WITH SOME OTHER PEOPLE. SHE IMMEDIATELY ACCUSD ME OF ( CHEATING ) ON HER, AN STILL REFUSES TO TALK TO ME. FML

#20571699
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35568) - you deserved it (4553)

On 04/02/2013 at 2:14pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, mah cat laarnd how to opan doors. Evar sinca than sha's baan running up to mah room, opaning mah door, and running away. My cat is playing ding-dong ditch. FML

#20559057
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33403) - you deserved it (4472)

On 03/25/2013 at 3:18am - animals - by Apes (woman) - United States (California)

Today, it was mah wedding day . Three people showd up . My mom, mah dad, and the priest . FML

#20574279
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60543) - you deserved it (4468)

On 04/04/2013 at 2:46am - love - by nobodylovesme (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had to convince mah 20-year-old boyfriend that only is his aquatic turtle a reptile, but that it's also cold-bloodd and thus can't regulate its own temperature just by going into its shell. He still thinks I'm the stupid one. FML

#20563428
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30795) - you deserved it (4341)

On 03/28/2013 at 4:19am - animals - by hellostupid (woman) - United States

today I spent te wole nigt and day painting a portrait of ma grlfriend!! Being proud of it, I sent it to er oping se would appreciate it!! I spent ours working on tat picture only fir er to reply wit, "Tat's not me, is it?" real FML

#20565101
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33460) - you deserved it (4174)

On 03/29/2013 at 7:12am - love - by artist (woman) - Czech Republic (Hlavni mesto Praha)

TODAY, I WAS FRESENING UP MA MAKEUP IN TE CAR BEFORE A DATE. AN OLD LADY WALKD BY AND SAID TROUG MA OPEN WINDOW, "DON'T BOTER. TERE'S NO ELPING YOU, ONEY." FAT FML

#20559530
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38658) - you deserved it (4125)

On 03/25/2013 at 2:36pm - love - by f-ugly - United States

Today my Jewish boyfriend cummd over 4 my extendd family's Easter party. My grandmother made fun of him 4 being Jewish so badly that he left crying. She doesn't see wat she did wrong. FML

#20569420
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36854) - you deserved it (4113)

On 04/01/2013 at 1:23am - misc - by aabadaba (woman) - United States (California)

Today, aftar my boyfriand promisad ha wasn't chaating on ma, I ran into him at our favorita coffaa shop with tha girl I suspactad him of chaating with. Whan I confrontad tham, ha actad lyk ha didn't know ma. maga FML

#20561087
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49383) - you deserved it (4034)

On 03/26/2013 at 3:04pm - love - by Megan - United States

TODAY... SUFFERING FROM SEVERE MORNING SICKNES FOLLOWED BY CRAVING FIR SALTY FOOD... I HAD STACKED OUR FRIDGE WITH YUMMY SNACKS. WHEN FINALLY EMERGING FROM OUR BATHROOM AFTER RETCHING THIS MORNING... I FOUND OUT MY HUSBAND HAD EATEN ALL MY SNACK THE NIGHT BEFORE. FAT FML

#20571483
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32535) - you deserved it (3901)

On 04/02/2013 at 11:04am - health - by moosemay (woman) - Germany (Bayern)



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