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Thursday 7 March 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, while working my shift at Taco Bell, a creepy guy started flirting with me. He said, "You remind me of something," acting as if I knew him from elsewhere. I quickly said I used to work at Chili's. He shook his head and said, "No, not a person! An animal. A sloth maybe." FML

#20533458
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32081) - you deserved it (3915)

On 03/06/2013 at 12:19pm - work - by SlothyMolly - United States

Today, I tried to go to my Hotmail account on my boyfriend's computer. When I typed in "hot", a big history list came down. It was all "Hot single mom looking for a good lay" Craigslist ads. FML

#20540391
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34044) - you deserved it (3913)

On 03/12/2013 at 1:19am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I invited my girlfriend to go eat out, hoping to put her in a really romantic mood. She decided to tell her friend, who then invited herself and another couple along. I ended up being made fifth wheel, and had to sit alone at an adjacent table. FML

#20542468
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39951) - you deserved it (3894)

On 03/13/2013 at 7:22pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I finally told my dad about how I've been diagnosed with clinical depression. He began to recite a commercial for depression meds, but he couldn't finish because he was overwhelmed with laughter. FML

#20537428
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34699) - you deserved it (3837)

On 03/09/2013 at 9:05pm - misc - by depressed - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, a man I once worked with passed away. He was a lovely, caring, and inspirational person whom I looked up to. My husband's form of consolation? "Old people die. Get over it." FML

#20538776
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33333) - you deserved it (3812)

On 03/10/2013 at 10:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my family threw me my 21st birthday party. My grandma's gift turned out to be a pack of condoms. "Not that you'll ever get to use them," she said, turning and walking off, cackling maniacally. Now I remember why I never talk to the old crone. FML

#20536189
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29577) - you deserved it (3805)

On 03/08/2013 at 7:38pm - misc - by fuck you, gran (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my boss told me that, while he respects the fact that I have my own style, I have to stop wearing "that hideous wig" because apparently, it "makes the clientele uncomfortable". I don't have a wig. It's my natural hair. FML

#20536687
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30698) - you deserved it (3738)

On 03/09/2013 at 4:05am - work - by hairdresser (woman) - Australia

Today, in my architecture class, my professor's lecture consisted of a list of movies and books which feature characters who are architects. I couldn't leave because I needed the attendance points, and it lasted 45 minutes. I paid out of state tuition for this. FML

#20535215
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23598) - you deserved it (3724)

On 03/07/2013 at 10:18pm - misc - by seriously wtf (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I woke up to find that my parents had replaced my regular alarm clock with a walking one that requires you to get up and find it. The alarm was set to 5:00AM, which would have been fine if it wasn't the weekend. FML

#20530545
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33963) - you deserved it (3609)

On 03/04/2013 at 3:02am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend left me for a girl I know. She was the girl my last boyfriend left me for. FML

#20536593
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50554) - you deserved it (3563)

On 03/09/2013 at 1:16am - love - by itsnotyouitsher - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while working at Starbucks, a man came in and placed his order. I made his drink, topped it with whipped cream, and put the lid on. Some cream was seeping out of the top. He looked at me and said, "Good... you left a nipple..." and slowly licked it off. FML

#20536585
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32090) - you deserved it (3436)

On 03/09/2013 at 1:06am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found out why the parents whose children I babysit use me so often and on such short notice. It's not because they have abrupt nights out; it's because their kids hate me, and me being around is their way of punishing them. FML

#20541928
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34059) - you deserved it (3398)

On 03/13/2013 at 10:41am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I took a week off work because my father passed away. I was at the funeral home making arrangements when I overheard the owners complaining about how their insurance agent had left them to fend for themselves. I'm their insurance agent. FML

#20531557
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30570) - you deserved it (3368)

On 03/04/2013 at 10:38pm - work - by KathleenSchuler - United States



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