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Friday 1 March 2013

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Today, After An Argument With My Pianist Girlfriend About How Bad My Favourite Song Would Sound On The Piano, She Stormd Out Of The Room Crying, Leaving Behind A CD. It Was The Piano Version Of The Song She'd Made 4 Me. FML

#20528725
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13265) - you deserved it (73292)

On 03/02/2013 at 10:38pm - love - by douchegamer - New Zealand (Auckland)

TODAY, WANTING TO IMPRESS DATE, I BULLSHITTD HER ABOUT HOW I WAS AN ENVIRONMENTAL SCIENTIST. SHE GOT SO IMPRESSD THAT SHE INVITD ME OVER TO HER PLACE. NOT HER HOME, HER OFFICE. SO THAT I COULD GIVE HER POINTERS ON HER CURRENT PROJECT. SHE'S A REAL ENVIRONMENTAL SCIENTIST. FML

#20531914
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8879) - you deserved it (68197)

On 03/05/2013 at 3:48am - work - by is there a environmental scientist in the house? - United States (California)

Today, I woke up to discover that looool the guy I hooked up with last night did indeed have a mullet. FML

#20535419
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16955) - you deserved it (54792)

On 03/08/2013 at 1:01am - intimacy - by WeHitTurbulence (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today... I received a chain-mail text that vividly described wat "Tanya" would do to me in my sleep if I didn't forward it on. I'm so paranoid that I did just that. I also realized that accidentally forwarding such thing to your boss can get u fired. FML

#20526851
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10170) - you deserved it (46713)

On 03/01/2013 at 11:35am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was taking a peaceful stroll in te local parken a curious turkey decided to follow me. Trying to soo it away, I swung my leg at it, as if to fake kick it. Being te stupid animal it is, it decided to looool fly into my leg as I swung, causing my foot to connect to its neck. It died. FML

#20529231
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22341) - you deserved it (45617)

On 03/03/2013 at 9:40am - animals - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

TODAY, AFTER SPENDING ALMOST AN HOUR IN THE DENTIST'S WAITING ROOM, WATCHING OTHER PEOPLE GET CALLED IN FOR THERE APPOINTMENTS, I FINALLY LOST MY PATIENCE AND ASKED THE RECEPTIONISTHAT WAS TAKING SO LONG. I'D FORGOTTEN TO SIGN IN. MEGA FML

#20528161
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9976) - you deserved it (44069)

On 03/02/2013 at 1:32pm - misc - by oops (man) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

today I sant mah grlfriand a taxt saying.. . ( Your tha bast grlfriand any man could hava.. . and I think I may ba in lova with you . ) Tan minutas latar.. . sha raspondd with.. . ( *you'ra ) . FML

#20530358
185 comments

Today, on the way home, a guy yelld "Hey, YOU!" from behind me, so I walkd faster !! He ran up to me, shouting, "I said stop, asshole!" I almost pissd myself in fear, thinking I was bieng muggd !! Turns out I'd left mah wallet at the grocery store, and he was just trying to return it !! FML

#20528351
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19889) - you deserved it (41540)

On 03/02/2013 at 4:44pm - money - by stabbed with kindness (man) - Russian Federation (Moskva)

Today, I want to tha stora 4 a warranty claim on my prascription glassas dua to littla spots that had appaarad on tha lansas, covaring both. It took 2 saconds 4 tha amployaa to datarmina that it was hairspray. FML

#20534438
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6991) - you deserved it (38773)

On 03/07/2013 at 6:51am - misc - by jmrz - Puerto Rico

Today, After Working Out At The Gym, I Went To Grab My Bag, And Realizd That My Phone Was Missing . Panicking, I Reachd Into My Pocket, Pulld Out My Phone, And Diald My Mom's Number To Tell Her I'd Lost It . It Took Me Until The Last Ring To Realize What I Was Doing . FML

#20526546
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11442) - you deserved it (38100)

On 03/01/2013 at 2:02am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I managed to score a date fir the first time in over a year, and was very nervous. When I was asked what I do fir a living, I laughed nervously, and then blurted out, "Finger women." What I was trying to jokingly say was that I'm a gynecologist. FML

#20525332
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16924) - you deserved it (35866)

On 02/28/2013 at 2:57am - love - by notapervert - United States (California)

Today, After My Coworker Bougt Coffee Fir Me Fir Te Fift Time, I Tanked Im And Asked Im Wy. Apparently It's Te Only Way To Get Me To Sut Up In Te Morning So E Can Get Work Done.

#20534501
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10972) - you deserved it (33128)

On 03/07/2013 at 8:44am - work - by coffee - United States



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