Wednesday 27 February 2013 
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Today, my wife packed my lunch. Inside of my lunchbox was a photo of her eating my sandwiches. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30191) - you deserved it (6125)
On 03/01/2013 at 2:18am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, I had to sneak out of work early to pick my 14-year-old son up from school. He and a friend had been found covered in Astroglide, racing each other down the corridor on their bellies. My boss noticed my absence from work, and now my son and I are both on suspension. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20984) - you deserved it (6059)
On 02/28/2013 at 7:15pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)
Today, my fiancé is returning home, so I decided to wax myself, thinking things would get intimate. I warmed the wax strips and set them on the counter. Our cat jumped onto the counter and managed to roll onto one of the strips. Suffice to say, the wrong pussy got a painful waxing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34233) - you deserved it (5966)
On 02/25/2013 at 12:57pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I was babysitting, and I had to pee really, really badly. I couldn't figure out how to get the stupid toilet lock off, and ended up pissing myself. As I stood in the bathroom in tears, their child screamed, "No, no, pee-pee in the POTTY!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (25381) - you deserved it (5909)
On 02/25/2013 at 2:16pm - kids - by soaked (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my brother called me, asking if I could help him do his taxes. Since he's a high school and college dropout, I thought all I had to do was a 1040EZ. No, last year he made more than twice what I earn, through self-employment. I have two Master's degrees and work at Burger King. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27379) - you deserved it (5893)
On 03/01/2013 at 9:35pm - misc - by tax-man - United States (South Carolina)
Today, I was so bored at a dinner party that I went to the bathroom to play games on my phone. One of my co-workers came in, so I rushed into a stall, but forgot to turn my phone's sound off. She heard it and said, "It's OK, music helps me shit too" and started blasting her music and grunting. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23038) - you deserved it (5590)
On 03/06/2013 at 9:39pm - work - by shittysongs - United States (Washington)
Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend by quietly undressing and sneaking into the bathroom to join him in the shower. He was bent over taking a dump, pushing his turd down the plughole. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32628) - you deserved it (5379)
On 02/27/2013 at 8:49am - misc - by anony (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I was trying to be sexy and change in front of my boyfriend. As I was changing, he started to talk to me about how we should both try and lose weight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26750) - you deserved it (5330)
On 02/26/2013 at 3:26pm - love - by pooh anne (woman) - United States (Arkansas)
Today, while on a crowded public bus, a cute girl asked if she could sit next to me. Problem is, I didn't hear correctly and thought she asked if anyone was sitting next to me. I answered no, causing her to walk off angrily and earning me several disgusted stares from other passengers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27494) - you deserved it (5231)
On 03/04/2013 at 9:23am - misc - by Anonymous - Taiwan (T'ai-pei)
Today, I was reciting lines for a play that I'm in. It was going great, until I realized that I was actually reciting my scripted sales pitch from my telemarketing job. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17212) - you deserved it (5226)
On 03/06/2013 at 12:44am - misc - by sales ham (man) - United States
Today, I realized that the only positive accomplishment my boyfriend has made in the last 3 years is that he started wearing deodorant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18795) - you deserved it (5165)
On 02/27/2013 at 10:28pm - love - by butterflyzag20 - United States
Today, while at the nail salon, my boyfriend called. Since I was getting my nails done, I had to put him on speaker. The whole salon heard him break up with me. I can still hear their snickering in my head. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26177) - you deserved it (5149)
On 02/25/2013 at 6:04pm - love - by HeatherRosure18 - United States (Illinois)
Today, my boyfriend of three years told me he was thinking about us taking a break. After an hour of crying and him saying it would be okay, I accepted it. When I asked when the break would start, he replied, "What are you talking about? I only said I'd thought about it" and then laughed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29859) - you deserved it (4861)
On 02/25/2013 at 1:10am - love - by Gullible (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Monday 20 May 2013
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