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Tuesday 19 February 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my son broke his hand when he and his best friend had the genius idea of punching each other in the fists as hard as they could. FML

#20520875
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23862) - you deserved it (2921)

On 02/24/2013 at 9:57pm - kids - by why the fuck would you do that - United States (Arizona)

Today, I had to spend a few hours in a hospital with a toddler and a preschooler projecting vomit all over, because my husband thinks "expiration dates are for pussies." FML

#20511774
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30008) - you deserved it (2908)

On 02/18/2013 at 2:44am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I stayed in a hotel near the college I was applying for a scholarship. We were eating breakfast and there were some other applicants in the breakfast room. As we walked away, my mother yelled, "My daughter's gonna get this scholarship so there's no reason for you muddafuckas to show up." FML

#20511941
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33000) - you deserved it (2895)

On 02/18/2013 at 9:01am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I met my new class. There are two Kevin Smiths. Neither will agree to a nickname, they have the same hair color, and their middle names both start with J. They have told me to call them Kevin 1 and Kevin 2. They both want to be Kevin 1. FML

#20512577
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35122) - you deserved it (2803)

On 02/18/2013 at 7:26pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, the people living below me have been blasting their music so loudly that I can hear every word as clear as day. The people next door think it's my music and feel the need to bang on the wall and blast their music just as loudly in revenge. I have two very important exams tomorrow. FML

#20515010
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31922) - you deserved it (2777)

On 02/20/2013 at 3:40pm - misc - by Ughh! - France

Today, my high-strung and normally very proper mother took twice her prescribed dose of Ambien, and extolled the virtues of a "full blown sexual relationship with oneself", advising my teenage sister to "only include the men when they behave." FML

#20511803
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28628) - you deserved it (2708)

On 02/18/2013 at 3:24am - intimacy - by buxton1 - United States (California)

Today, I went back home after seeing the doctor, I told my boyfriend my new medicine might cause some mood swings. He immediately grabbed his phone and pretended to take a call, then rushed out. FML

#20516690
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19778) - you deserved it (2667)

On 02/21/2013 at 8:21pm - health - by NewDrugs (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, it's my first day at a new school. I transferred here halfway through the year to get away from a girl who bullies me. She's apparently bullied her mom into transferring her here as well. FML

#20513405
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38769) - you deserved it (2634)

On 02/19/2013 at 12:05pm - misc - by SchoolSucks (woman) - United States

Today, while at work, my ex-boyfriend came in. I pretended not to see him, hoping he would just pass on by. No such luck. He stopped to tell me that he was there for orientation. My company hired him. FML

#20519937
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26996) - you deserved it (2550)

On 02/24/2013 at 8:56am - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a co-worker invited me to go out for lunch with him. I politely declined, saying I had too many errands to do. The truth is that I'm just too broke. I'll be buying myself a burrito using quarters I found on the floor of my car. FML

Today, for the second time this week, I was asked to stop putting on such an obviously fake "British" accent. I am British and have lived here all my life. FML

#20513499
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30600) - you deserved it (2492)

On 02/19/2013 at 1:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, my parents told me that I'm no longer allowed to come home from boarding school on weekends because it will confuse my cats and disrupt their lives. FML

#20519879
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37476) - you deserved it (2422)

On 02/24/2013 at 6:17am - animals - by incendiaaa (woman) - Australia

Today, I got a new roommate after having a horrible relationship with the previous one. She seemed nice at first, until our first night together. She got completely wasted, spilled beer all over my bed and blew chunks into my fish tank. FML

#20513351
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25625) - you deserved it (2387)

On 02/19/2013 at 10:46am - misc - by Anonymous - United States



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