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Friday 15 February 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I emailed 10 parents inviting them to my son's birthday party. All 10 emailed back saying their kids had to get a cavity filled. FML

#20517380
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31948) - you deserved it (3334)

On 02/22/2013 at 9:51am - kids - by Paris101 - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was struck down with horrible diarrhea. With barely any toilet paper left, I texted my husband to buy some more and rush home. He replied, "Sorry babe, getting shitfaced with the lads. Get it? 'Shitfaced'. LOL!" and stopped replying to my desperate pleas. FML

#20517914
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28208) - you deserved it (3308)

On 02/22/2013 at 7:31pm - health - by arse of fire :( (woman) - United Kingdom (Slough)

Today, I've been single for so long my grandmother had to ask if I actually like women or not. FML

#20513781
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25733) - you deserved it (3296)

On 02/19/2013 at 6:07pm - love - by Forever alone Guy - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my mother started cursing at a lady for tooting her horn at her in traffic, because there was "no need for road rage". When I tried to calm her down, she slammed on the brakes and told me to get out and walk. FML

#20509033
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25058) - you deserved it (3290)

On 02/16/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by howannoying - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I started at my new job. The woman who I'll be working right next to 40 hours a week introduced herself with, "I know what your name is. I know what you're planning, and I've been sent to destroy you." FML

#20512419
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29369) - you deserved it (3245)

On 02/18/2013 at 5:15pm - work - by ari (woman) - United States

Today, while at the store with my mom, we ran into the girl I recently confessed to being interested in. My mom decided to shout, "IS THAT HER?! IS THAT THE GIRL YOU LIKE?!" Embarrassed, I desperately told her to be quiet. She grounded me for being "rude" to her. FML

#20508609
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32932) - you deserved it (3135)

On 02/15/2013 at 7:39pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Italy (Lombardia)

Today, I had my girlfriend over for dinner with my family. My father had dressed up as a girl for a recent gig of his at a local pub. This got somehow brought up at the table. The rest of the dinner conversation consisted of him and my girlfriend discussing bras and lingerie. FML

#20503190
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27005) - you deserved it (3120)

On 02/12/2013 at 12:55am - love - by BadLuckCarson - United States (Iowa)

Today, my girlfriend bought herself a brand new iPad and iPod Touch, and returned my aging iPod and Kindle, which she constantly steals for her own use. She considers it my Valentine's Day present. FML

#20506625
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25231) - you deserved it (3079)

On 02/14/2013 at 3:23pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Germany

Today, my maid of honor, who offered to take care of my wedding dress before the D-Day, left it near her open window during heavy rain. My dress is now ruined, and she's backed out due to stress. I'm supposed to be getting married tomorrow. FML

#20503604
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30572) - you deserved it (3047)

On 02/12/2013 at 12:41pm - misc - by Meaghan (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my girlfriend of nine months made a huge scene in public, calling me a "cheating bastard" because she saw me with another woman at the library. That "other woman" is my Calculus tutor. FML

#20514871
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29834) - you deserved it (3006)

On 02/20/2013 at 1:20pm - love - by ? - United States (California)

Today, I had to yet again explain to the guy I live with that just because you can't see dirt, it doesn't mean it's clean. And so letting his dog lick the plates is NOT the same thing as washing up. He won't listen to me, and he uses my plates. FML

#20507079
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27763) - you deserved it (2930)

On 02/14/2013 at 8:08pm - animals - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I met my new class. There are two Kevin Smiths. Neither will agree to a nickname, they have the same hair color, and their middle names both start with J. They have told me to call them Kevin 1 and Kevin 2. They both want to be Kevin 1. FML

#20512577
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36855) - you deserved it (2926)

On 02/18/2013 at 7:26pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had to spend a few hours in a hospital with a toddler and a preschooler projecting vomit all over, because my husband thinks "expiration dates are for pussies." FML

#20511774
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30200) - you deserved it (2912)

On 02/18/2013 at 2:44am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)



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