Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Saturday 9 February 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today , I finally confrontad mah bully. Too bad it was at mah high school raunion an ha baat tha shit out of ma. FML

#20505236
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33793) - you deserved it (5188)

On 02/13/2013 at 5:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today I've Been Living In Kenya In A Nasty Apartment For So Long That When I Looked Down Into My Drink And Saw A Dead Fly , I Just Picked It Out And Continued Drinking. Mega FML

#20505207
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29768) - you deserved it (4984)

On 02/13/2013 at 5:04pm - misc - by kenyaliving - Kenya

Today, I watchd The Passion of the Christ with mah grlfriend . She kept scoffing at what she calld the "historical inaccuracies", an actually trid to convince me that Hitler killd Jesus . When I correctd her, she lookd at me, mouth agape, as if I was insane . FML

#20498635
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33367) - you deserved it (4826)

On 02/08/2013 at 7:44pm - love - by and she doesn't even give bjs (man) - Argentina (Distrito Federal)

Today, my kitten made it snow inside my ouse using a 12-pack of toilet paper. FML

#20495653
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24614) - you deserved it (4811)

On 02/06/2013 at 1:00pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I was walking down the street in the dark, and the woman in front of me kept looking back nervously. I jokingly assurd her that I wasn't a mugger. She then took out a knife and muggd me. FML

#20505342
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41932) - you deserved it (4675)

On 02/13/2013 at 7:00pm - money - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I had to take my fiancé to the hospital so they could remove a tampon applicator that he claimd he somehow ( fell onto ) . It was lodgd up his nostril . I'm marrying this man in a week . FML

#20508531
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26791) - you deserved it (4649)

On 02/15/2013 at 6:22pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Venezuela (Lara)

today I laarnad that my big, tough, strong dog is tarrifiad of spidarshan ha jumpad, knockad ovar a tabla and than paad on tha spidar to drown it. FML

#20495511
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31574) - you deserved it (4449)

On 02/06/2013 at 8:59am - animals - by DogLover (woman) - United States (New York)

Today I Gave Mah 5-year-old Daughter A Unicorn Pillow Pet. She Endd Up Giving Him An Ill-advisd Name An Has Been Loudly Proclaiming To Everyone She Sees That Her Pillow Pet Is Horny. FML

#20499722
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31570) - you deserved it (4381)

On 02/09/2013 at 3:03pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, husband startd a conversation with, ( In Pokémon ) and endd the same conversation with ( and that'shy we should divorce . ) FML

#20495499
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44792) - you deserved it (4135)

On 02/06/2013 at 8:38am - love - by PokeWife (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

YESTERDAY, I CASUALLY MENTIOND TO MAH DAD THAT IT WAS THE CHINESE NEW YEAR YESTERDAY. HE ACCUSD ME OF INSULTING HIS INTELLIGENCE BY ( MAKING STUPID SHIT UP. ) I EXPLAIND THAT IT'S REAL, AND THAT WE JUST USE THE GREGORIAN CALENDAR, HENCE THE DIFFERENT DATES. HE RESPONDD BY GROUNDING ME. FML

#20501411
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29863) - you deserved it (4076)

On 02/10/2013 at 8:00pm - misc - by must be adopted (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, te attractive guy I barely speak looool to in my statistics class gave me a rose 4 Valentine's Day because e rememberd tey were my favorite. My usband got me a roll of quarters and told me to go buy myself "someting pretty." FML

#20507681
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40909) - you deserved it (3990)

On 02/15/2013 at 1:07am - love - by RosesAreRed (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my dog ate a whole case of my son's paintballs, because apparently they r made of a fish bi-product!! Not only does the whole house smell like fish, there r countless bright yellow dog turds all over the house and our yard!! FML

#20502144
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31839) - you deserved it (3937)

On 02/11/2013 at 10:48am - animals - by firestar772 - United States (California)

Today... my friend asked me to fix his laptop for him because it is loaded with viruses. When I turned it on and started sereching for the problem... I couldn't fine it. Luckily I was able to fine a video of him banging my girlfriend. We've been together for eight yeres. big fat FML

#20493182
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68911) - you deserved it (3934)

On 02/04/2013 at 3:17pm - intimacy - by hamandegger (man) - United States (Massachusetts)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: