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Thursday 7 February 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, as I was walking to my car, I noticed a car with a tail light out. Trying to be a good citizen, I walked up to the driver's side door and said "excuse me". The lady then maced me through the open window. FML

#20494408
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21078) - you deserved it (2133)

On 02/05/2013 at 12:45pm - health - by maced face - United States

Today, I found out I'm pregnant. My husband had a vasectomy this past summer after our son was born and only took one of the two tests. I haven't cheated. He refuses to believe me or get his spunk checked again. FML

#20500417
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27773) - you deserved it (2131)

On 02/10/2013 at 12:17am - misc - by Totallyscrewed - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, at a mixed-family game of rugby, my dad resorted to calling me a "goddamned accident" and eventually body-slamming me, just so I'd stop playing long enough for his team to score. FML

#20498727
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22048) - you deserved it (2100)

On 02/08/2013 at 8:53pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I had a half-hour conversation with my parents about going to college. I don't know what's worse, that they were trying to talk me out of it or that they're convinced that I'm going to get knocked up and drop out by the end of my freshman year. FML

#20492659
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21426) - you deserved it (2064)

On 02/04/2013 at 2:12am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I told my parents that I was going to hang out with some friends. My dad guffawed and said, "Ooh, look at Mary, pretending she has a social life." Thanks, Dad. FML

#20498469
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21690) - you deserved it (2022)

On 02/08/2013 at 5:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Havering)

Today, my friend asked me to fix his laptop for him because it is loaded with viruses. When I turned it on and started searching for the problem, I couldn't find it. Luckily I was able to find a video of him banging my girlfriend. We've been together for eight years. FML

#20493182
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56504) - you deserved it (2008)

On 02/04/2013 at 3:17pm - intimacy - by hamandegger (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because he found out my birthday is the same day as his, and he thinks we are twins who were separated at birth. FML

#20505216
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32776) - you deserved it (1965)

On 02/13/2013 at 5:09pm - love - by okay then (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my furnace broke down, almost a month after its twenty year warranty expired. It would have been replaced for free. Now I'm going to have to take out a loan to afford the $4,000 replacement. FML

#20500397
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21955) - you deserved it (1950)

On 02/10/2013 at 12:03am - misc - by chillyinside - Canada

Today, I went to college on bike through snow and hail only to find out my professor can't make it to class due to the weather. She lives down my street. FML

#20495386
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24007) - you deserved it (1947)

On 02/06/2013 at 3:45am - misc - by refticon (man) - Belgium (Antwerpen)

Today, I had my girlfriend over for dinner with my family. My father had dressed up as a girl for a recent gig of his at a local pub. This got somehow brought up at the table. The rest of the dinner conversation consisted of him and my girlfriend discussing bras and lingerie. FML

#20503190
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21902) - you deserved it (1928)

On 02/12/2013 at 12:55am - love - by BadLuckCarson - United States (Iowa)

Today, working as a waitress, I was asked by a customer, yet again, how my baby was doing. I don't have a baby, but I do look very similar to my 25-year-old coworker, who's a new mom. People confuse us all the time. Unfortunately, my crush, who was standing nearby, doesn't know that. FML

#20504501
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23042) - you deserved it (1907)

On 02/13/2013 at 12:12am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my needle-phobic mother took me to get a shot. She fainted. FML

#20503278
21 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17284) - you deserved it (1810)

On 02/12/2013 at 2:41am - health - by shots shots shots (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after three and a half years of working dead-end jobs with a bachelor's degree, I got a call from a potential employer in my degree field, who wanted to set up an interview. The problem: the interview is across the country, and I'm too broke to pay the travel expenses. FML

#20498605
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23712) - you deserved it (1809)

On 02/08/2013 at 7:19pm - work - by goingnowherefast (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)



Allison Myres Perry & Jim Perry 's illustrated FML

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Monday 20 May 2013

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