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Saturday 2 February 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I found out my boyfriend sleeps on a Princess Leia pillow. He's 22. FML

#20494713
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22564) - you deserved it (8197)

On 02/05/2013 at 5:59pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was talking to the girl I really like, and she was telling me how crappy her day was. Trying to be nice, I gave her a back rub. I somehow managed to unhook her bra. FML

#20498998
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32279) - you deserved it (8189)

On 02/09/2013 at 12:13am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was telling my boyfriend how proud I am of him for finding a really good job. He interrupted me to tell me that my breath smelled like his cat's. FML

#20484067
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21917) - you deserved it (7972)

On 01/28/2013 at 11:44pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I tripped while walking down a large flight of stairs. As I fell forward, I instinctively reached out and grabbed onto one of the guys walking up. I ended up taking him and two other people down with me, earning myself a great many disgusted glares as I dusted myself off. FML

#20489268
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22703) - you deserved it (7127)

On 02/01/2013 at 5:53pm - health - by Awkward (man) - United Kingdom (Wolverhampton)

Today, I was running late for work and quickly grabbed my outfit from the dryer. I heard the crackling of static as I took out my shirt. I didn't think anything of it, until later when my co-worker pointed out I had a thong stuck to my back. FML

#20491168
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26857) - you deserved it (7126)

On 02/03/2013 at 2:32am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend and I were looking at engagement rings. When the store owner asked about our budget, my boyfriend said with a straight face, "Nothing too expensive, I have a big penis so I don't have to overcompensate by buying a big diamond." FML

#20494997
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34680) - you deserved it (6702)

On 02/05/2013 at 9:31pm - love - by NewlyDread (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after weeks of practice, I proudly did 9 chin-ups on my chin-up bar. As soon as I was done, my 11-year-old daughter came over and banged out 12 of them. Then she wiped her sweaty hands off and did 8 more. Then she gave me pointers on my technique. FML

#20493569
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30617) - you deserved it (6688)

On 02/04/2013 at 8:00pm - health - by WeakerThanaLittleGirl (man) - United States

Today, during a date, I discovered that if I cough with my mouth closed, snot will spray from my nose all over the place like some kind of mucus cannon. FML

#20484952
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28904) - you deserved it (6296)

On 01/29/2013 at 4:23pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I actually considered my boyfriend romantic and deserving of an award when he didn't fart after sex. FML

#20488602
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35014) - you deserved it (6231)

On 02/01/2013 at 2:01am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I'm getting married. A few months ago, I allowed my mother in-law to take care of catering. She begged to be a part of the wedding, so I gave her the caterer's number and order info. It appears that I will not be eating at my own wedding because she decided to order food I'm allergic to. FML

#20482739
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33332) - you deserved it (6205)

On 01/28/2013 at 6:52am - love - by forever1990 (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I attended my first surgery as part of my program at med school. I found out that when I see someone's intestines, I vomit. Even if I'm still wearing a surgical mask. There goes the thousands of dollars I spent on college. FML

#20495058
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29023) - you deserved it (6112)

On 02/05/2013 at 10:08pm - health - by A troubled ex med school student - United States (Ohio)

Today, my fiancé told me that it would be okay with him if I got plastic surgery to make my boobs larger. It would also be okay with him if I didn't get the surgery, but he would call off our engagement and never talk to me again. FML

#20499439
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52532) - you deserved it (6065)

On 02/09/2013 at 11:11am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, as I was leaving for my chemistry exam, I stepped on one of the countless sheets of chemistry notes that littered the floor following last night's studying. I managed to slip and knock myself out in my own living room. FML

#20489863
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24646) - you deserved it (6044)

On 02/02/2013 at 2:50am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)



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