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Friday 25 January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, at my cousin's birthday party, my grandma took me to one side, slipped me a pad, and started ranting that tampons "steal your virginity" and that I should never use them. Well, okay then. FML

#20481357
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29311) - you deserved it (2251)

On 01/27/2013 at 2:08pm - misc - by dynah114 (woman) - Israel (HaMerkaz)

Today, my mom barged into my room at three in the morning, demanding to know where I'd been. I'd been in my room sleeping since ten o'clock. In that time she had called the police, all of my friends, and my ex-boyfriend, asking if I was with them. FML

#20479024
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35147) - you deserved it (2201)

On 01/26/2013 at 12:14am - misc - by Sarah - United States

Today, while checking out a couple at work, I handed them their receipt and wished them a good day. The woman promptly pulled her husband to the side, and whispered to him about how much of a "fucking idiot" I was for making the prices so high. I work at McDonald's. FML

#20488361
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28464) - you deserved it (2188)

On 01/31/2013 at 11:06pm - work - by stupidapperently (woman) - United States

Today, my daughter tried to cover up her relapse into pyromania by explaining to me that the reason our carpet caught on fire was because a hot coal somehow worked its way free from the fireplace. Our fireplace is electric. FML

#20478067
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26473) - you deserved it (2178)

On 01/25/2013 at 1:00pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, as a firefighter, we were called to assist the ambulance crew with lifting a deceased patient out of a house. Little did I know, he had been dead inside for 3 weeks, and was bloated and popped like a water balloon when we attempted to move him. My girlfriend made soup for the evening meal. FML

#20488428
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38683) - you deserved it (2178)

On 01/31/2013 at 11:39pm - work - by Fireguy92 (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I discovered that my downstairs neighbor is running a business out of her apartment. Or I should say, her pimp is. FML

#20473717
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27146) - you deserved it (2176)

On 01/22/2013 at 8:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I came home to find two letters from a publishing house that I'd submitted my manuscript to. The first was congratulatory, stating that my book had been accepted for publishing. The second was apologetic, stating that the first letter had been intended for someone else. FML

#20479103
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34168) - you deserved it (2141)

On 01/26/2013 at 1:14am - work - by strugglingartist (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I spent most of my daughter's 8th birthday with her in the hospital while her broken arm was put in a cast. Apparently, my son had told her that some people gained the ability to fly on their 8th birthday before encouraging her to find out by jumping off the slippery slide. FML

#20486554
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24508) - you deserved it (2086)

On 01/30/2013 at 5:50pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, the last customer of the night shift handed me their money along with a wad of their hair. FML

#20484636
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24527) - you deserved it (2071)

On 01/29/2013 at 11:39am - work - by imwithapples22 (man) - United States

Today, most of my neighbours came to my house in an angry mob to complain about my dog barking. I don't have a dog. FML

#20488553
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30410) - you deserved it (2056)

On 02/01/2013 at 1:09am - animals - by Angry Mob - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my pants ripped while I was at work. I had to keep my balls to the wall while I dodged customers and edged ever closer to the break room. Before I could call my wife and ask her to bring a new pair, my boss burst in, got pissed, and made me go back out and deal with irate customers. FML

#20487736
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25310) - you deserved it (2055)

On 01/31/2013 at 3:27pm - work - by fuckit (man) - Italy (Lazio)

Today, I was waiting inside the shelter at the bus stop when a lady came up to me and asked if I would mind if she peed. FML

#20476019
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26859) - you deserved it (2022)

On 01/24/2013 at 2:17am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, my boss put me on suspension for violating company policy by having non-work related mail in my inbox. They were spam emails. FML

#20478634
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28075) - you deserved it (2020)

On 01/25/2013 at 8:04pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)



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