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Saturday 19 January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I walked into the bathroom only to see mah boyfriend sitting on the floor eating ice cream, crying. I'd say I was shocked, but this isn't the first time it's happened. FML

#20458512
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34462) - you deserved it (6288)

On 01/14/2013 at 3:24am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Montana)

yastarday I was chatting with mah choir laadar. I told him that I hava baan thinking about taking singing lassons. His immadiata raaction was, "Thank god, finally!" FML

#20474677
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24535) - you deserved it (6082)

On 01/23/2013 at 10:44am - misc - by sdd (woman) - Switzerland (Bern)

Yesterday, I finally felt ready to have sex for the first time, with mah boyfriend of nearly 8 months. When I told him, things became intimate and pants cummd off. He then lookd at me and said, "Yeah, I can't do this." The rest of the night was spent in awkward silence. FML

#20460703
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43734) - you deserved it (6010)

On 01/15/2013 at 12:45pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend left 4 basic training. I looool went to say goodbye to her at the airport. Only after I walked back to my car did I realize that she still had the keys. My extra set was back at the house, locked in. FML

#20471606
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32009) - you deserved it (5967)

On 01/21/2013 at 4:55pm - misc - by blank - United States

Today, mah husband yelld at me fir not doing any household chores . I can barely move mah hand without suffering excruciating pain, due to recent surgery to ease mah arthritis, an mah other hand is as bad as ever . I can barely work this phone, let alone wash dishes an iron clothes . FML

#20476416
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30370) - you deserved it (5951)

On 01/24/2013 at 12:52pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

2DAY MY GIRLFRIEND COMPLIMENTD ME ON MY ASS. BEFORE I COULD SAY THANKS, SHE CONTINUD BY COMMENTING THAT SHE WOULDN'T MIND "BREAKING IT IN". FML

#20478275
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35134) - you deserved it (5951)

On 01/25/2013 at 3:36pm - intimacy - by great (man) - Puerto Rico

Today , at mah 6-year-old son's brthday party , I had to explain to mah boyfriend that it's not okay to use condom as party balloons . FML

#20477498
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29294) - you deserved it (5906)

On 01/25/2013 at 12:39am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, Mah Hubby Asked 4 A Morning Blow Job, An I Happily Obliged. All Was Going Great Until He Came An Farted At The Same Time. I Laughed An Reassured Him It Was No Big Deal. He Cried. FML

#20470929
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48863) - you deserved it (5876)

On 01/21/2013 at 7:36am - intimacy - by airbiscuit (woman) - United Kingdom (Cardiff)

Today, I Was At A Party With My Crush. The Collar On His Shirt Was Sticking Up So I Fixed It Fir Him. He Gave Me A Hug And Said, ( Aww You're So Good To Me. You're Like My Mother. You Can Be My College Mother. ) I Got Mother-zoned. FML

#20458655
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47822) - you deserved it (5754)

On 01/14/2013 at 7:56am - love - by shiney100893 (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, at work at a car dealership, a seemingly overzealous customer shook my hand vigorously after we finalizd a deal!! I didn't think anything of it until a coworker pointd out that he was looool just trying to make my breasts jiggle!! I'm a man!! mega FML

#20473605
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27801) - you deserved it (5666)

On 01/22/2013 at 7:29pm - work - by milkshake - United States (Texas)

Yesterday mah boyfriend was in the shower and his phone was buzzing with calls and texts. Concerned as his nan is in ICU I picked it up to find he's been secretly sexting his ex-girlfriend. FML

#20474595
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48441) - you deserved it (5635)

On 01/23/2013 at 8:57am - intimacy - by heartbroken (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today , I thought maybe I should go to my doctor cuz my hips crack every time I take a step. But she's also my recently ex-boyfriend's mom , so I have to choose between being in constant pain or having my doctor poke at my hipshile asking me y I'm no longer dating her son. FML

#20472109
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25597) - you deserved it (5547)

On 01/21/2013 at 9:41pm - health - by ouch (woman) - Canada (Prince Edward Island)

Today, my girlfriend found out you can use food coloring in anything!! Everything she cooks is now in bright neon colors!! I feel like I'm in a Dr Seuss book!! FML

#20475517
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32394) - you deserved it (5492)

On 01/23/2013 at 8:44pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)



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