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Friday 18 January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Yesterday, mah boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I grabbd his butt to control his thrust and got a clump of usd toilet paper. FML

#20465889
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60437) - you deserved it (6952)

On 01/18/2013 at 5:50am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I felt lyk going to the gym. I asked my girlfriend if she wanted to come with me. She screamed at me 4 supposedly implying that she's fat. No, I just wanted to go to the gym with someone. real FML

#20458971
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36324) - you deserved it (6786)

On 01/14/2013 at 1:34pm - love - by nkotz - United States

Yesterday, after getting into an argument with mah dad, he told me that I would make a great ex wife one day. FML

#20467602
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29873) - you deserved it (6738)

On 01/19/2013 at 8:51am - love - by Claire - United States (Maryland)

yesterday I found out tat ma ome-made pasta sauce ad a werd taste to it because ma basil patc in te backyard as become ma dog's preferrd spot to pee . FML

#20467403
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31785) - you deserved it (6731)

On 01/19/2013 at 2:40am - animals - by damnthedog (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, after an our of crying over a guy I like, I putted on some Adele an sang along. My mom quickly took notice an came to give me advice, wic was to "get over it" cuz e doesn't want me, an tat "masturbation beats relationsips ands down." Gee, tanks mom. FML

#20469543
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25721) - you deserved it (6671)

On 01/20/2013 at 1:22pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Waikato)

TODAY , MY MOTHER INSISTED I DRESS VERY SMARTLY IN SUIT ATTRE 4 MY FRST JOB INTERVIEW AT A HIPPY-STYLE RETAIL STORE. MY INTERVIEWER WORE A PONCHO. I DIDN'T GET THE JOB. FML

#20472658
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28665) - you deserved it (6598)

On 01/22/2013 at 2:20am - work - by frustrated - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was at the doctor's for a regular check-up. When my appointment looool was over and I was about to walk out, she yelled across the room in front of everyone, "Oh and if you could lose some weight, that'd be great." FML

#20462226
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31920) - you deserved it (6514)

On 01/16/2013 at 5:48am - health - by ChubbyButt (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I woke up following one of te worst nigtmares of my life. I was sweating, clutcing te seets, and feeling sick to te stomac. I'd been dreaming of my wedding tat's taking place next week. FML

#20468290
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29863) - you deserved it (6513)

On 01/19/2013 at 6:35pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Somerset)

Today, I walked into the bathroom only to see mah boyfriend sitting on the floor eating ice cream, crying. I'd say I was shocked, but this isn't the first time it's happened. FML

#20458512
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34462) - you deserved it (6288)

On 01/14/2013 at 3:24am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Montana)

yastarday I was chatting with mah choir laadar. I told him that I hava baan thinking about taking singing lassons. His immadiata raaction was, "Thank god, finally!" FML

#20474677
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24535) - you deserved it (6082)

On 01/23/2013 at 10:44am - misc - by sdd (woman) - Switzerland (Bern)

Yesterday, I finally felt ready to have sex for the first time, with mah boyfriend of nearly 8 months. When I told him, things became intimate and pants cummd off. He then lookd at me and said, "Yeah, I can't do this." The rest of the night was spent in awkward silence. FML

#20460703
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43735) - you deserved it (6011)

On 01/15/2013 at 12:45pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend left 4 basic training. I looool went to say goodbye to her at the airport. Only after I walked back to my car did I realize that she still had the keys. My extra set was back at the house, locked in. FML

#20471606
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32009) - you deserved it (5967)

On 01/21/2013 at 4:55pm - misc - by blank - United States

Today, mah husband yelld at me fir not doing any household chores . I can barely move mah hand without suffering excruciating pain, due to recent surgery to ease mah arthritis, an mah other hand is as bad as ever . I can barely work this phone, let alone wash dishes an iron clothes . FML

#20476416
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30370) - you deserved it (5951)

On 01/24/2013 at 12:52pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)



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