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Tuesday 15 January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Yesterday..!! mah grlfriend returned home from a several week vacation with family!! Instead of a happy reunion..!! I was terribly emasculated..!! publicly..!! 4 bringing flowers that "weren't as pretty looool as all the other couples' in baggage claim." FML

#20458802
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33053) - you deserved it (3245)

On 01/14/2013 at 10:47am - misc - by badenoughflowers - United States (Texas)

Taday my kitten tried jumping into a hot oven... a dryer... a dishwasher... a looool toilet... an a fish-tank. Curiosity is going to kill my cat. FML

#20470154
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31698) - you deserved it (3245)

On 01/20/2013 at 8:47pm - animals - by AnonCat (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today... I was having a conversation with mah mother during which I describd something as being pungent. She thought I had made up the word... so I grabbd the dictionary to show her that I hadn't. She then became enragd... threw the dictionary at mah head and told me never to talk to her again. FML

#20463921
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31030) - you deserved it (3227)

On 01/17/2013 at 1:38am - misc - by Mizzaroo - United States (Washington)

my mothar cummd back from har trip to Vagas. Har braast wara obviously 2 lattar sizas largar. I askd if sha got a boob job and sha danid it , saying that it's against har raligion. Sha's an athaist , and a liar. FML

#20460160
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35313) - you deserved it (3205)

On 01/15/2013 at 12:45am - misc - by Brooke - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend gave me lingerie from Victoria's Secret . He then added that his mother picked it out . FML

#20459473
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29850) - you deserved it (3111)

On 01/14/2013 at 7:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Newfoundland)

Today, while making dinner I cut mah finger badly with a knife. When I yelled 4 mah dad to drive me to the hospital, he accused me of lying to get attention. He had to taste mah blood before he decided it wasn't red-colored corn syrup. FML

#20458321
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35471) - you deserved it (3098)

On 01/14/2013 at 12:52am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

TODAY, SOMEONE BROKE INTO CAR BY SMASHING THE DRIVER'S SIDE WINDOW. I'D BE LESS RRITATED IF THEY HAD JUST USED THE DOOR HANDLE; THE LOCK HAS BEEN BROKEN FIR YERES. BIG FAT FML

#20467580
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28646) - you deserved it (3072)

On 01/19/2013 at 8:14am - money - by Perplexed - United States (South Dakota)

Today , I saw in my browser history a profile from one of those "Facebook of sex" websites . Turns out that my boyfriend has been posting naked picture of himself on there using my laptop and flirting with teenage girls . His excuse? "I have friend looool on there." big fat FML

#20466217
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29058) - you deserved it (2975)

On 01/18/2013 at 12:21pm - love - by TheOtherWoman (woman) - United Kingdom (North Somerset)

Today, I went an bought lunch 4 all the people I work with. The only meal the place forgot was mine. big fat FML

#20473074
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29372) - you deserved it (2902)

On 01/22/2013 at 1:49pm - work - by me - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, management told me that I couldn't looool have a doorbell on my door . How did they get my attention to tell me this? By ringing my doorbell . FML

#20462282
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27138) - you deserved it (2869)

On 01/16/2013 at 7:21am - misc - by pigtails (woman) - United Kingdom (Norfolk)

Today, grandfater askd me y te broccoli I servd fir dinner was wite!! I told im it was cauliflower!! He would't believe me, accusd me of being a Russian spy, and stormd out!! FML

#20461359
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31543) - you deserved it (2805)

On 01/15/2013 at 7:58pm - misc - by veggieluver (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had to drag my grandmother out of a store because she went up to a black family and started apologizing for slavery. fat FML

#20472335
17 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40916) - you deserved it (2766)

On 01/21/2013 at 11:08pm - misc - by daddy's girl - United States (Pennsylvania)

TODAY , MY MOTHER-IN-LAW GAVE ME A BOTTLE OF CHAMPAGNE FOR MY BIRTHDAY . THIS IS THE THIRD YEAR IN A ROW SHE HAS DONE THIS . I'M A RECOVERING ALCOHOLIC , AND SHE'S WELL AWARE OF THAT FACT . FML

#20462057
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37292) - you deserved it (2758)

On 01/16/2013 at 1:36am - health - by Ari (woman) -



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