Tuesday 15 January 2013 
Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time
Today, I caught my 4 year old son yet again trying to drink out of the toilet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24848) - you deserved it (3614)
On 01/22/2013 at 6:39am - kids - by dani0810 - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my hubby asked for a morning blow job, and I happily obliged. All was going great until he came and farted at the same time. I laughed and reassured him it was no big deal. He cried. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37206) - you deserved it (3536)
On 01/21/2013 at 7:36am - intimacy - by airbiscuit (woman) - United Kingdom (Cardiff)
Today, I was discussing with my husband how it was time I stopped taking birth control so we could have a baby. He looked at me and said sincerely, "We're a little young to be having kids, don't you think?". He's 35 and I'm 32. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25993) - you deserved it (3439)
On 01/20/2013 at 8:13am - love - by StillTooYoung (woman) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I came home to find my girlfriend crying. Concerned, I quickly asked her what was wrong. She told me tearfully that she couldn't understand why her pet lizards hadn’t grown into dinosaurs yet, and that pet store had cheated her. I’m still concerned now, but for entirely different reasons. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31153) - you deserved it (3351)
Today, my husband sent me a text before heading home from work. All it said was, "Need a fuck. Backed up to hell. You're about to shower face first in a fire hydrant." Love you too, hun. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22026) - you deserved it (3252)
On 01/18/2013 at 3:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was talking to my grandma and I mentioned the fact that tomatoes are technically fruit. It's been an hour and she's still yelling, accusing me of lying to her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20077) - you deserved it (3198)
On 01/22/2013 at 8:35pm - misc - by I should have kept my mouth shut - United States (California)
Today, as part of a charity project called Operation Valentine, I worked with 150 other volunteers to make care packages and Valentine's Day cards to send to the troops in Afghanistan, thanking them for their courage. My boyfriend called the cards "cheating" and now refuses to see me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31562) - you deserved it (3169)
On 01/15/2013 at 2:23am - love - by helpme (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I went on a date with a co-worker I've been interested in for some time. The topic of discussion she chose over lunch: how she's living a double-life as an escort in Flint and that she thinks she's picked up an STD from unprotected sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26207) - you deserved it (3094)
On 01/22/2013 at 12:20pm - love - by SonofDonald (man) - United States
Today, after applying for a job at a tanning salon, I was told they don't hire "naturally tan" people. I'm black. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39589) - you deserved it (2930)
On 01/21/2013 at 7:48am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Maryland)
Today, I went on a run with my crush. She expressed how happy she was to have a decent running partner, because the last one kept complaining he thought he might throw up. We got to the top of the hill and I puked right in front of her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26285) - you deserved it (2920)
On 01/16/2013 at 7:53pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Hawaii)
Today, my mother burst into tears and hysterics when she found out my fiancée and I were not "pure" for our upcoming wedding. I'm 28, she's 27, and we've lived together for four years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24529) - you deserved it (2888)
On 01/22/2013 at 3:09am - love - by deflower (man) - United States (California)
Today, my husband asked me to show him my boob. I began to pull the side of my shirt down when he said, "No, not that one, the big one." FML
I agree, your life sucks (31949) - you deserved it (2794)
On 01/21/2013 at 9:27pm - intimacy - by sarah6786 (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my kitten tried jumping into a hot oven, a dryer, a dishwasher, a toilet, and a fish-tank. Curiosity is going to kill my cat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25933) - you deserved it (2765)
On 01/20/2013 at 8:47pm - animals - by AnonCat (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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