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Saturday 12 January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, after hours of trying to put a screaming baby to sleep, she finally fell asleep in my arms. I was so happy. Then, I got the hiccups. FML

#20456464
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29475) - you deserved it (2383)

On 01/13/2013 at 1:15am - kids - by hiccups - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my dad made a voodoo doll out of a melon. This seems to happen a lot. FML

#20449532
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21040) - you deserved it (2363)

On 01/09/2013 at 2:02am - misc - by Anonymous - Israel

Today, my dad learned that it's possible to power a lightbulb with a potato. Since then, he's been going around the house removing all the plugs from the wall and plugging them into potatoes instead. He's absolutely baffled as to why it won't work. FML

#20450090
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27451) - you deserved it (2348)

On 01/09/2013 at 2:23pm - misc - by Darkandcold - United Kingdom (Devon)

Today, within the first 15 minutes of a nonstop 8-hour flight, the guy sitting next to me picked an eyelash he found on my face, stared at it for a few seconds, and stuck it in his mouth. FML

#20447129
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41430) - you deserved it (2328)

On 01/07/2013 at 11:16pm - misc - by legitweirdo - United States (New York)

Today, my wife has the flu, while I have strep throat. We have a two-year-old toddler and have no clue as to who's more contagious and who should take care of her as to not get her sick. Yay for the entire day of surgical masks and Sesame Street. FML

#20448554
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26302) - you deserved it (2325)

On 01/08/2013 at 7:26pm - health - by Curly (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I found out that my dad, thinking it was an advertisement, threw away a letter from the college I applied to. FML

#20454916
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34231) - you deserved it (2318)

On 01/12/2013 at 4:52am - misc - by gdog10122 - United States

Today, I attended my aunt's open-casket funeral. My sister spent the first quarter of an hour neither grieving nor celebrating her life, but whining that the "cute" clothes my aunt was dressed in could have been handed down to her, instead of being "wasted". FML

Today, as per usual, my mother went to see her psychic, who told her that one of her children is harbouring a "dark secret". Now we're all grounded until one of us confesses our obviously non-existent secret. FML

#20457387
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34214) - you deserved it (2263)

On 01/13/2013 at 4:02pm - misc - by daughter of a gullible cunt (woman) - Australia

Today, a bull escaped from the small farm down the street. It ended up in my yard and would not let me outside. I called animal control, who said, "We only deal with regular animals." FML

#20465397
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32466) - you deserved it (2153)

On 01/17/2013 at 10:48pm - animals - by bull-stuff - United States (South Carolina)

Today, while moving into my new place, I saw my new, elderly neighbor sitting on her porch. I cheerfully greeted her with, "Hello, how are you?" She simply rocked slowly in her chair and replied, "Just waiting to die." She was the most cheerful person I met all day. FML

Today, I was making wedding plans with my fiancé. His mother kept complaining about everything, and insisted it was pointless to plan because it's just our "first marriage." She then tried to convince him to dump me and move back in with her because "she's all he'll ever need." FML

Today, I was the last person in line for going on the bus. Incidentally, I was right behind a guy way taller and wider than me. When he got on the bus, the bus driver immediately shut the door behind him. I was left outside chasing after the bus. FML

#20462065
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30868) - you deserved it (2036)

On 01/16/2013 at 1:42am - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, due to technical problems, I had to call the company's IT-support as my computer went totally haywire. I explained via phone that I couldn't access anything. The support then tried contacting me by e-mail and got upset with me when I didn't answer. FML

#20463766
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28041) - you deserved it (1999)

On 01/17/2013 at 12:03am - work - by Beva (woman) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)



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