Sunday 6 January 2013 
Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time
Today, at a house party, I finally got the guy I've been seeing alone in his room. We started making out, and I got on top of him to take control. He responded by saying he couldn't do it because he needed to go make pizza for his friends, and then bolted out of the room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29633) - you deserved it (6445)
On 01/02/2013 at 2:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my boyfriend called me anti-social. To prove him wrong I texted one of my friends. She texted back, "Who's this??" FML
I agree, your life sucks (15152) - you deserved it (6413)
On 01/04/2013 at 1:18am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, my boyfriend of over a year told me he wanted to learn Korean before Spanish. Apparently, being able to sing along to Gangnam Style is more important to him than being able to speak with my family. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30200) - you deserved it (6239)
On 01/11/2013 at 5:24am - love - by Latina (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I had a fight with my boyfriend over a girl he is close to. He later arrived with flowers for what I thought was an apology. He was actually breaking up with me; the flowers were for her, he just didn't want to leave them in the car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20767) - you deserved it (5912)
On 01/04/2013 at 9:08am - love - by damn (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I found out that I was pregnant and sent a picture of the positive test to my boyfriend. Before I got a text back from him, I got his newly updated Facebook status that read "This has got to be the most depressing day of my life." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17813) - you deserved it (5908)
On 01/06/2013 at 3:17am - misc - by kiken.bara - United States
Today, I learned that toddlers cannot fully digest raisins. I learned this first-hand when my 15-month-old began pooping them whole. In the bathtub. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13986) - you deserved it (5878)
On 01/04/2013 at 11:59am - kids - by Raela (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I got into an accident on my motorcycle. When I told my wife that the doctor said I couldn't have sex for two weeks, she couldn't contain her joy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32604) - you deserved it (5780)
On 01/08/2013 at 12:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, my hamster died. It climbed out of its cage and jumped off my dresser. Looking for condolences, I told my mom who replied, "If I lived in your room, I would have done it earlier." FML
I agree, your life sucks (22266) - you deserved it (5716)
On 01/11/2013 at 2:09am - animals - by deadhammy (man) - United States (California)
Today, after a week of intense fighting, my girlfriend of 4 years and I hung out. She told me she loved me, and I pointed out that last week she said she was going to dump me. Without missing a beat, she replied, "Only to scare you into submission." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23744) - you deserved it (5693)
On 01/12/2013 at 1:32am - love - by thanksbabe - United States
Today, my vegan boyfriend told me that if he were forced to kill either his cat or me, he'd kill me because he "would never kill an animal." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29016) - you deserved it (5488)
On 01/13/2013 at 11:49pm - animals - by Abendigo77 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I have been single and out of the game for so long that instead of having real wet dreams, I now dream about jacking off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28744) - you deserved it (5419)
On 01/01/2013 at 12:26pm - intimacy - by lonely dreams - United States (Nevada)
Today, I took my boyfriend to meet my parents. As he was loading his truck, I went inside to take a surreptitious shit. I ended up clogging the toilet, and so the first thing my mom said to my boyfriend was, "You'll have to find another bathroom; she just clogged it all up." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23630) - you deserved it (5400)
On 01/09/2013 at 2:57pm - misc - by thanksmom (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I woke up after sleeping with my boyfriend for the first time. I rolled over and smiled at him, and the first thing he said was, "You farted. A lot." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24699) - you deserved it (5384)
On 01/07/2013 at 10:40am - love - by gassy - United States (Texas)
Monday 17 June 2013
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