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Sunday 6 January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, trying to be sweet, I told my girlfriend that I'm so happy we met one another. She muttered, "Well, that makes one of us." FML

#20453944
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32663) - you deserved it (3103)

On 01/11/2013 at 5:22pm - misc - by wtf did i do?? (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was yet again asked to show my hall pass. I'm 23 and work at a middle school. I've worked here for the last five months, so not only do I look 13 years old, I'm also not memorable enough for my own coworkers to recognize me. FML

#20454196
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39356) - you deserved it (3060)

On 01/11/2013 at 8:11pm - work - by Can'tAgeOrMakeFriends (woman) - United States

Today, my daughter learned a new song. This would be great, except for the lisp her teacher has. I now have a child screaming about the "itchy bitchy spider" at the top of her lungs. FML

#20448629
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37921) - you deserved it (3055)

On 01/08/2013 at 8:01pm - kids - by ugh (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I had to explain to my husband that the 5-second rule doesn't apply if you drop the floss into the toilet. FML

#20458013
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36638) - you deserved it (3016)

On 01/13/2013 at 10:36pm - misc - by PeeFlavouredFloss (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my boyfriend knocked into me with his car. I drove myself to the hospital because he couldn't stop laughing long enough to drive. FML

#20434038
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32540) - you deserved it (2991)

On 12/31/2012 at 1:13pm - misc - by anon - United States (California)

Today, I found out that my son told my daughter at some point that "real" name for Hershey's Kisses is "blowjobs." I found this out because at kindergarten she was asked what her favorite food was. The teacher wasn't happy when she called me. FML

#20452458
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34888) - you deserved it (2931)

On 01/10/2013 at 7:51pm - kids - by Grant - United States

Today, one of my paintings was accepted into a local art gallery. It would've been a dream come true, had my "best friend" not submitted it under her own name and taken all the credit. FML

#20453750
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41447) - you deserved it (2911)

On 01/11/2013 at 2:47pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I've been struggling with my English paper for the past hour, because I can't concentrate. This is because my mom is in the room next to me, singing to her pet rat about what a cute little boy he is, in between yelling at him to stop "molesting" her. FML

#20452365
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34782) - you deserved it (2884)

On 01/10/2013 at 7:02pm - animals - by theycallmekitty (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I waited over an hour for my bus. As I finally saw it approaching, I reached into my purse to grab my ticket. The lady next to me then gave the driver a hand signal to keep driving. FML

#20451303
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35614) - you deserved it (2878)

On 01/10/2013 at 1:13am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I have severe back pain that is only relieved by lying flat on my bed. I also have acid reflux that is only prevented by sitting straight up. FML

#20453200
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41415) - you deserved it (2772)

On 01/11/2013 at 3:03am - health - by Kftc88 - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me at my grandma's funeral. FML

#20452848
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47211) - you deserved it (2757)

On 01/10/2013 at 11:06pm - love - by good job bf (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, after hours of trying to put a screaming baby to sleep, she finally fell asleep in my arms. I was so happy. Then, I got the hiccups. FML

#20456464
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33041) - you deserved it (2700)

On 01/13/2013 at 1:15am - kids - by hiccups - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my boss "borrowed" my prescription sunglasses off my desk. She crashed her car because they made her dizzy, and thinks I should pay for the damages. FML

#20447961
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50511) - you deserved it (2692)

On 01/08/2013 at 12:45pm - work - by whateven (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)



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