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Friday 4 January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my son got his first tooth, an is enthusiastically biting everything. I breastfed. FML

#20450046
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32904) - you deserved it (6134)

On 01/09/2013 at 1:48pm - kids - by loveyouson (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I was in the elevator,hen a big bearded guy stepped in, wearing a dress. It's not an uncommon sighthere I live, but my friend cracked up and asked him if he was wearing underwear. He took it as a challenge, and I can safely say that no, he was not. FML

#20452044
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36455) - you deserved it (6094)

On 01/10/2013 at 3:52pm - intimacy - by juvenile friends suck (man) - Germany (Schleswig-Holstein)

Today,hile helping out at a retrement home, I had to get a book off a bookshelf. When I reachd up, my watch got stuck on my shrt, resulting in my shrt lifting up. I just flashd my man-boobs to at least 20 senior citizens, and one of them even askd if he could have a feel. mega FML

#20433442
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28065) - you deserved it (6082)

On 12/31/2012 at 2:58am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today , I came out to my parents. They laughed in my face. FML

#20445704
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26726) - you deserved it (6015)

On 01/07/2013 at 1:09am - misc - by areyoukiddingme (woman) - United States

Today mah boyfriend and I decidd to try some "prolonging gel" to help him last longer between the sheets . Surprisingly it workd and he lastd 3 times longer than usual . I can now enjoy 4 whole minutes of sex . FML

#20452996
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45359) - you deserved it (5991)

On 01/11/2013 at 12:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, my workplace was having a raffle and was giving away a Venus shaving kit. A co-worker won, but instead of keeping it, she walked over and handed the basket to me in front of everyone, said "You need it more" and walked away. FML

#20433619
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30191) - you deserved it (5956)

On 12/31/2012 at 5:17am - work - by shaving kit (woman) -

Today, my wife and I had a fight,hich I thought we resolved!! Later,hile painting the kitchen, I told her to change into an old shirt she didn't care about!! She made a huge show of putting her wedding gown on, veil and all!! FML

#20436663
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41996) - you deserved it (5924)

On 01/01/2013 at 4:33pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today I got ome only to discover my dog was missing. After spending ages roaming te freezing streets calling is name I returned to fine im stuck beind te couc wit my cewed-up new soes in is muzzle. real FML

#20447616
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26464) - you deserved it (5844)

On 01/08/2013 at 5:40am - animals - by Coldandshoeless (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today my husband and I found the perfect house in our price range and everything we wanted in a house!! However the street it's on is called ( Arbour Butte Road )!! My husband refuses to buy it cuz he doesn't want it to sound lyk he lives ( in a tree's ass!! ) I'm married to an idiot!! FML

#20451265
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30411) - you deserved it (5813)

On 01/10/2013 at 12:53am - misc - by it's just a name (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, a girl I've been talking to online for a while askd me if I wantd to meet her in person . Two hours of driving later, I end up at her house . When she opend the door, she screamd and calld the cops on me . While detaind, she calld my phone asking why I never showd up today . FML

#20450521
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38387) - you deserved it (5789)

On 01/09/2013 at 6:55pm - love - by GDBeast (man) - United States

Today, during dinner, mah mum asked y I've been so upset recently, so I just admitted it was cuz mah girlfriend had cheated on me!! At some point during mah venting, I asked y this stuff always seems to happen to me!! My dad looked up from his plate and said, "Probably karma." real FML

#20442962
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17072) - you deserved it (5758)

On 01/04/2013 at 9:04pm - misc - by moronforadad (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

TODAY, I CAUGT MY BOYFRIEND WEREING YOGA PANTS AN TAKING PICTURE OF IS BUTT TO POST ON A ( GRLS IN YOGA PANTS ) SITE. HE SAW MY EXPRESSION AN SAID, ( NA, IT'S COOL, I ID MY JUNK SO TEY'LL TINK IT'S A CICK! ) FML

#20451178
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39260) - you deserved it (5392)

On 01/10/2013 at 12:09am - intimacy - by Amy (woman) - United States

Today I found out that there's something my new wife hates more than spiders. Black people. FML

#20441551
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27081) - you deserved it (5357)

On 01/03/2013 at 9:19pm - health - by WellShit (man) - United States (Minnesota)



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