Sunday 30 December 2012 
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Today, I got fired from my job because I "look too grumpy." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23871) - you deserved it (7070)
On 01/02/2013 at 2:28am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, after I finally laid down from a long day and was about to fall asleep, I realized I forgot to set my alarm. I don't own an alarm clock and my alarm is on my phone. Which was in my car. I live on 15th floor of an apartment building and our parking garage is across the street. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25932) - you deserved it (6505)
On 01/03/2013 at 12:02am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, at a house party, I finally got the guy I've been seeing alone in his room. We started making out, and I got on top of him to take control. He responded by saying he couldn't do it because he needed to go make pizza for his friends, and then bolted out of the room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29340) - you deserved it (6433)
On 01/02/2013 at 2:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I was getting pretty horny, and I thought some dirty talk would turn him on. Amid my panting, I breathed the words, "Fuck me." He then stopped and said, "Excuse me, I don't like hearing that language." and wouldn't continue until I corrected myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37405) - you deserved it (6430)
On 12/24/2012 at 8:32am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my boyfriend called me anti-social. To prove him wrong I texted one of my friends. She texted back, "Who's this??" FML
I agree, your life sucks (15071) - you deserved it (6397)
On 01/04/2013 at 1:18am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, my boyfriend and I were in bed and I asked him why he was with me. His answer was, "Well, the last girl I dated was really smart and she always made me feel dumb, so I decided to switch things up a bit. You make me feel like a genius babe." FML
I agree, your life sucks (32317) - you deserved it (6385)
On 12/24/2012 at 12:33am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I woke up to find my boyfriend using my hand to wank. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34994) - you deserved it (6320)
On 12/28/2012 at 6:40am - intimacy - by kmtranter - United Kingdom (Brent)
Today, my dad asked me when I was going to start looking for a job. Jokingly, I told him next year. He got pissed, started to yell, then realized Tuesday is New Year's Day and grounded me for "being a dumbass." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21693) - you deserved it (6074)
On 12/30/2012 at 10:51pm - work - by BAMN2187 - United States
Today, a girl mistook me for her boyfriend and broke up with me because I'm "a liar and a cheating bastard." I've never seen her in my life, but I'm so lonely that I tried to convince her to give me another chance and stay with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32009) - you deserved it (6004)
On 12/28/2012 at 12:24am - love - by Alone - United States
Today, I found out that I was pregnant and sent a picture of the positive test to my boyfriend. Before I got a text back from him, I got his newly updated Facebook status that read "This has got to be the most depressing day of my life." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17709) - you deserved it (5900)
On 01/06/2013 at 3:17am - misc - by kiken.bara - United States
Today, I learned that toddlers cannot fully digest raisins. I learned this first-hand when my 15-month-old began pooping them whole. In the bathtub. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13903) - you deserved it (5870)
On 01/04/2013 at 11:59am - kids - by Raela (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my cat had the greatest idea ever: hide inside our Christmas tree and attack anyone who walks past. It would have come as extremely funny to me if I hadn't been her first victim. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22597) - you deserved it (5540)
On 12/27/2012 at 5:16am - animals - by DarkDisaster (woman) - United States
Today, I have been single and out of the game for so long that instead of having real wet dreams, I now dream about jacking off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28415) - you deserved it (5411)
On 01/01/2013 at 12:26pm - intimacy - by lonely dreams - United States (Nevada)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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