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Sunday 30 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, at my four-year-old daughter's insistence, I looked for - and found - a radio station that plays "Santa music" all year round. She's ecstatic and I can't turn it off without upsetting her. FML

#20436981
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18167) - you deserved it (7149)

On 01/01/2013 at 7:18pm - kids - by christmaswillneverend - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went out to meet a wonderful woman I'd chatted with online. I did have a few fears about if she was really just some guy trying to make a fool out of me. When I met her, she really was a girl, and was happy to see me. Problem: she was actually 13. I'm 34. FML

#20444863
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20826) - you deserved it (7104)

On 01/06/2013 at 12:24pm - love - by lifsabtch (man) -

Today, I got fired from my job because I "look too grumpy." FML

#20437963
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23926) - you deserved it (7081)

On 01/02/2013 at 2:28am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my boyfriend and I were in bed and I asked him why he was with me. His answer was, "Well, the last girl I dated was really smart and she always made me feel dumb, so I decided to switch things up a bit. You make me feel like a genius babe." FML

#20417781
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33072) - you deserved it (6508)

On 12/24/2012 at 12:33am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I was getting pretty horny, and I thought some dirty talk would turn him on. Amid my panting, I breathed the words, "Fuck me." He then stopped and said, "Excuse me, I don't like hearing that language." and wouldn't continue until I corrected myself. FML

#20418295
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37791) - you deserved it (6450)

On 12/24/2012 at 8:32am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at a house party, I finally got the guy I've been seeing alone in his room. We started making out, and I got on top of him to take control. He responded by saying he couldn't do it because he needed to go make pizza for his friends, and then bolted out of the room. FML

#20438672
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29622) - you deserved it (6445)

On 01/02/2013 at 2:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend called me anti-social. To prove him wrong I texted one of my friends. She texted back, "Who's this??" FML

#20442068
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15150) - you deserved it (6411)

On 01/04/2013 at 1:18am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up to find my boyfriend using my hand to wank. FML

#20427495
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35468) - you deserved it (6354)

On 12/28/2012 at 6:40am - intimacy - by kmtranter - United Kingdom (Brent)

Today, a girl mistook me for her boyfriend and broke up with me because I'm "a liar and a cheating bastard." I've never seen her in my life, but I'm so lonely that I tried to convince her to give me another chance and stay with me. FML

#20427124
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32151) - you deserved it (6013)

On 12/28/2012 at 12:24am - love - by Alone - United States

Today, I had a fight with my boyfriend over a girl he is close to. He later arrived with flowers for what I thought was an apology. He was actually breaking up with me; the flowers were for her, he just didn't want to leave them in the car. FML

#20442364
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20767) - you deserved it (5912)

On 01/04/2013 at 9:08am - love - by damn (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I found out that I was pregnant and sent a picture of the positive test to my boyfriend. Before I got a text back from him, I got his newly updated Facebook status that read "This has got to be the most depressing day of my life." FML

#20444550
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17808) - you deserved it (5908)

On 01/06/2013 at 3:17am - misc - by kiken.bara - United States

Today, I learned that toddlers cannot fully digest raisins. I learned this first-hand when my 15-month-old began pooping them whole. In the bathtub. FML

#20442461
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13984) - you deserved it (5878)

On 01/04/2013 at 11:59am - kids - by Raela (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my cat had the greatest idea ever: hide inside our Christmas tree and attack anyone who walks past. It would have come as extremely funny to me if I hadn't been her first victim. FML

#20425350
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22696) - you deserved it (5546)

On 12/27/2012 at 5:16am - animals - by DarkDisaster (woman) - United States



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Monday 17 June 2013

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