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Friday 28 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today my dad askd me wen I was going to start looking for a job. Jokingly I told im next year. He got pissd startd to yell ten realizd Tuesday is New Year's Day and groundd me for "bieng a dumbass."

#20432925
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28113) - you deserved it (8350)

On 12/30/2012 at 10:51pm - work - by BAMN2187 - United States

Today , a grl mistook me for her boyfriend and broke up with me cuz I'm "a liar and a cheating bastard." I've never seen her in my life , but I'm so lonely that I tried to convince her to give me another chance and stay with me. fat FML

#20427124
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38788) - you deserved it (7975)

On 12/28/2012 at 12:24am - love - by Alone - United States

Today , I walked in on my sister plucking her nipples. A shame I didn't get a big fuck-off bottle of brain bleach for Christmas. FML

#20422121
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30217) - you deserved it (7829)

On 12/25/2012 at 8:49pm - intimacy - by FuckMyEyes (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my cat had the greatest idea ever: hide inside our Christmas tree and attack anyoneho walks past. It would have come as extremely funny to me if I hadn't been her first victim. FML

#20425350
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30473) - you deserved it (7698)

On 12/27/2012 at 5:16am - animals - by DarkDisaster (woman) - United States

Today mah boyfriend and I were in bed and I asked him y he was with me . His answer was ( Well the last girl I dated was really smart and she alway made me feel dumb so I decided to switch thing up a bit . You make me feel like a geniu babe . ) FML

#20417781
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39196) - you deserved it (7430)

On 12/24/2012 at 12:33am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

TODAY , WHILA SHARING A FAW BAARS ON THA COUCH WITH MY BOYFRIAND , HA DRUNKANLY UTTARAD THA FATAFUL WORDS , "BABA , IF I COULD SUCK MY OWN DICK , YOU'D BA SINGLA AS HELL." FML

#20426492
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53617) - you deserved it (7244)

On 12/27/2012 at 7:24pm - intimacy - by well, i am now (woman) - United States

Today, as I have been looool for 10 years, I'm allergic to fruit. After an argument with mother, she yelld, "Here, have a banana and go kill yourself!" FML

#20434659
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48078) - you deserved it (7205) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/31/2012 at 5:09pm - misc - by aelia_oups - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend calld me anti-social. To prove him wrong I textd one of my friends. She textd back, "Who's this??" big fat FML

#20442068
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19791) - you deserved it (7170)

On 01/04/2013 at 1:18am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I jokingly askad my boyfriand if ha was chaating on ma!! Ha rapliad, "Nah, all tha chicks in this town r fuck-ugly." and starad at ma until I laft tha room!! Good to know that's his only raason fir staying faithful!! FML

#20430536
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28313) - you deserved it (7067)

On 12/29/2012 at 6:54pm - love - by single once again (woman) - United Kingdom (Havering)

Today, I learnd that toddlers cannot fully digest raisins. I learnd this first-hand when mah 15-month-old began pooping them whole. In the bathtub. FML

#20442461
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18894) - you deserved it (6696)

On 01/04/2013 at 11:59am - kids - by Raela (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I had a fight with mah boyfriend over a grl he is close to. He later arrivd with flowers fir what I thought was an apology. He was actually breaking up with me; the flowers were fir her, he just didn't want to leave them in the car. FML

#20442364
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25690) - you deserved it (6593)

On 01/04/2013 at 9:08am - love - by damn (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I pausd the movie mah grlfriend an I were watching an told her, 4 the frst time, that I lovd her. Her response was to stare at me silently 4 a few seconds before unpausing the film. mega FML

#20440422
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35923) - you deserved it (6484)

On 01/03/2013 at 6:43am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)



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