Friday 28 December 2012 
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Today, my boyfriend called me anti-social. To prove him wrong I texted one of my friends. She texted back, "Who's this??" FML
I agree, your life sucks (15080) - you deserved it (6400)
On 01/04/2013 at 1:18am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, my boyfriend and I were in bed and I asked him why he was with me. His answer was, "Well, the last girl I dated was really smart and she always made me feel dumb, so I decided to switch things up a bit. You make me feel like a genius babe." FML
I agree, your life sucks (32332) - you deserved it (6388)
On 12/24/2012 at 12:33am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I woke up to find my boyfriend using my hand to wank. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35100) - you deserved it (6328)
On 12/28/2012 at 6:40am - intimacy - by kmtranter - United Kingdom (Brent)
Today, my dad asked me when I was going to start looking for a job. Jokingly, I told him next year. He got pissed, started to yell, then realized Tuesday is New Year's Day and grounded me for "being a dumbass." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21702) - you deserved it (6074)
On 12/30/2012 at 10:51pm - work - by BAMN2187 - United States
Today, a girl mistook me for her boyfriend and broke up with me because I'm "a liar and a cheating bastard." I've never seen her in my life, but I'm so lonely that I tried to convince her to give me another chance and stay with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32030) - you deserved it (6005)
On 12/28/2012 at 12:24am - love - by Alone - United States
Today, I learned that toddlers cannot fully digest raisins. I learned this first-hand when my 15-month-old began pooping them whole. In the bathtub. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13903) - you deserved it (5872)
On 01/04/2013 at 11:59am - kids - by Raela (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my cat had the greatest idea ever: hide inside our Christmas tree and attack anyone who walks past. It would have come as extremely funny to me if I hadn't been her first victim. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22617) - you deserved it (5541)
On 12/27/2012 at 5:16am - animals - by DarkDisaster (woman) - United States
Today, I have been single and out of the game for so long that instead of having real wet dreams, I now dream about jacking off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28451) - you deserved it (5412)
On 01/01/2013 at 12:26pm - intimacy - by lonely dreams - United States (Nevada)
Today, my husband came home with a bunch of realistic-looking wigs for women. When I asked them what they were for, he said he wanted to spice up our sex life with them. When I told him I refused to wear a wig, he said in a very serious tone that I wasn't going to be the one wearing them, he was. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32539) - you deserved it (5362)
On 01/02/2013 at 5:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, as I have been for 10 years, I'm allergic to fruit. After an argument with my mother, she yelled, "Here, have a banana and go kill yourself!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (39880) - you deserved it (5295) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 12/31/2012 at 5:09pm - misc - by aelia_oups - Sent from mobile version
Today, I walked in on my sister plucking her nipples. A shame I didn't get a big fuck-off bottle of brain bleach for Christmas. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19456) - you deserved it (5213)
On 12/25/2012 at 8:49pm - intimacy - by FuckMyEyes (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I jokingly asked my boyfriend if he was cheating on me. He replied, "Nah, all the chicks in this town are fuck-ugly." and stared at me until I left the room. Good to know that's his only reason for staying faithful. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21977) - you deserved it (5143)
On 12/29/2012 at 6:54pm - love - by single once again (woman) - United Kingdom (Havering)
Today, my 6-year-old nephew opened his Christmas gift. The first words out of his mouth were, "This is cheap." FML
I agree, your life sucks (25369) - you deserved it (4795)
On 12/28/2012 at 2:03am - kids - by UngratefulBrat - United States (New York)
Monday 20 May 2013
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