Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Friday 28 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was at church, when my mom's phone went off during the sermon. As if that wasn't humiliating enough for me, her ring tone was set to the Bed Intruder song. FML

#20430388
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23622) - you deserved it (3319)

On 12/29/2012 at 5:33pm - misc - by killme (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, I got a phone call from my boyfriend breaking things off with me. He waited until the day after Christmas because he wanted all his presents. And he got me nothing. FML

#20423285
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42238) - you deserved it (3291)

On 12/26/2012 at 9:32am - love - by Jolene - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. I felt down, so I laid in bed and told my parents I needed some alone time. A couple of minutes later, one of them started blasting "All by Myself" so loud that I felt the floorboards vibrate. FML

#20420113
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29402) - you deserved it (3247)

On 12/25/2012 at 12:00am - love - by all by myself - United States (Alaska)

Today, I woke up to find pieces of a dead spider stuck in my braces. FML

#20423697
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46067) - you deserved it (3233)

On 12/26/2012 at 2:30pm - misc - by gaggin - United States (California)

Today, my friend put my phone number on Craigslist. I still can't find the ad, but obviously everyone else can because I still haven't stopped receiving naked pictures. FML

#20419133
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30061) - you deserved it (3175)

On 12/24/2012 at 4:06pm - misc - by Chanman1924 - United States

Today, I had to watch my drunk girlfriend yell at a cat for not having periods. The worst part is that she was at a pet store. The pet store at which I work. FML

#20431107
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27129) - you deserved it (3147)

On 12/30/2012 at 12:20am - misc - by Wtf is wrong with her (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my 24-year-old brother again yelled at me for looking at him while he was on the toilet. It'd be easier not to if he didn't sit on the toilet with the door wide open, and if the bathroom wasn't directly opposite my bedroom. FML

#20438837
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28669) - you deserved it (3107)

On 01/02/2013 at 3:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I woke up on my boyfriend's bedroom floor. When I asked him why I was there, he said I'd gotten too hot, so he rolled me off his bed. I have the flu and a fever. FML

#20422616
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31738) - you deserved it (3102)

On 12/25/2012 at 11:56pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my skydiving instructor casually remarked that he wouldn't mind "diving into" me sometime. He was strapped to my back the whole way down. FML

#20434488
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34541) - you deserved it (3089)

On 12/31/2012 at 5:44pm - intimacy - by _The__Doctor_ (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, at a restaurant, I happily watched as my boyfriend of three years got down on his knees and proposed to me. Before I could say yes and hug him, a girl flung herself at him, kissed him and shouted, "Yes!" With us still highly confused, she then ran away. FML

#20431269
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38961) - you deserved it (3007)

On 12/30/2012 at 1:29am - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I found my diary on my mother's nightstand. Bookmarked. FML

#20417856
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33982) - you deserved it (2974)

On 12/24/2012 at 1:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was leaning over cleaning a table at work, when my pretty coworker came up behind me and slapped me on the butt. I was so startled that I slipped and smashed my face into the table. Now she can't look at me without laughing. FML

#20430634
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25222) - you deserved it (2883)

On 12/29/2012 at 8:01pm - work - by nose hurts (man) - United States (Virginia)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: