Friday 21 December 2012 
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Today, I dyed my naturally-blonde hair dark brown. Upon seeing me, my boyfriend immediately wanted to have sex, because I now remind him of his favourite porn star. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29670) - you deserved it (9019)
On 12/22/2012 at 12:56pm - intimacy - by brunetteshavemorefun (woman) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)
Today, I had to explain to my fiancé that having me watch him jerk off over a porno is not in fact considered foreplay. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32072) - you deserved it (8610)
On 12/20/2012 at 5:45pm - intimacy - by alicia (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I was woken up by my dog scratching at my door. After a while of this, I finally got up to let her in. When I opened the door, she looked at me, threw up, and scurried away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19245) - you deserved it (8566)
On 12/20/2012 at 2:50pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - Spain (Canarias)
Today, I received a package from a local guy on Craigslist. Instead of the iPhone I paid $350 for, the box only contained a photo of an iPhone. The guy had been dumb enough to attach a return address, so my husband went over and beat the shit out of him. I now have to bail him out of jail. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32537) - you deserved it (8441)
On 12/23/2012 at 12:52pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, as every day for the past few weeks, my husband won't have sex. His reason? We've decided to have a baby, and he reckons that the longer he waits, the more competition there will be between his sperm and thus the better the result will be. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38783) - you deserved it (8117) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 12/26/2012 at 11:04pm - love - by Bouh (woman) - Sent from mobile version
Today, I set up a spy cam in my room to find out which one of my pervy brothers has been using my computer to watch porn. Turns out it was actually my father. I now have a video of him sitting in my chair masturbating, and I can't get it out of my head. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36720) - you deserved it (8089)
On 12/28/2012 at 2:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Malaysia (Selangor)
Today, my neighbor installed a large radio that loudly plays Christmas music 24/7. When I called in a complaint to the police department they told me to, "get in the Christmas spirit." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23998) - you deserved it (7899)
On 12/17/2012 at 9:28pm - misc - by James (man) - United States
Today, a friend informed me that my dog's name means "penis" in Greek. I live in a predominantly Greek neighbourhood, and apparently I've been screaming for "dong" every evening for the past 3 years. No wonder they don't talk to me much. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25184) - you deserved it (7589)
On 12/18/2012 at 10:30am - misc - by Dog_Lover (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, due to bad weather, my dad let me take his car to drive to my apartment 3 hours away. I only realized when I got there that my keys were still sitting on my parents' kitchen counter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20522) - you deserved it (7399)
Today, my boyfriend ended sex by yelling, "THIS IS SPARTA!" and using his foot to push me off the bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44570) - you deserved it (7274)
On 12/23/2012 at 11:55pm - intimacy - by Saradee (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I noticed one of my neighbors has decided to place an old toilet in the middle of their front lawn. Another one has had a kitchen sink in their driveway for a year, and yet another has a sofa in their grass. These are the people who taunt me for just walking my cat outside on a leash. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19686) - you deserved it (6902)
On 12/19/2012 at 12:02am - misc - by SApprentice (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, my house was broken into. The cop that came turned out to be a guy I fought over a girl with in high school. He sneered and said that everything appeared to be in order, and that I probably ransacked my own house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29037) - you deserved it (6630)
On 12/20/2012 at 6:19am - misc - by doblex (man) - United States
Today, I received my soccer team jacket that I ordered a month ago. Trying to save money, I'd selected the "no name" option to avoid an extra $20 embroidering fee. My jacket now has "NO NAME" spelled out on the side of it, and I was charged the extra $20 dollars after all. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33059) - you deserved it (6448)
On 12/23/2012 at 12:01am - money - by Anonymous (man) - Canada
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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