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Tuesday 18 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I accidentally knocked over a mall Santa on his way to meet some children. I've never had that many hate-filled eyes on me at once. FML

#20404919
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26604) - you deserved it (5741)

On 12/18/2012 at 12:15am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I confronted my 18-year-old daughter about her excessively lengthy showers. She said she didn't see the big deal, considering the water "comes free with the house." No dear, it doesn't. FML

#20414355
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35427) - you deserved it (5569)

On 12/22/2012 at 6:29pm - kids - by Jane (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I saw my daughter dusting her furniture with the white handkerchief I gave her as a wedding present. It's been in our family for 4 generations. FML

#20405217
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33167) - you deserved it (5396)

On 12/18/2012 at 5:03am - kids - by teejayrn -

Today, I walked in on my son and his friend comparing their penis sizes. They're 6. FML

#20415295
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36332) - you deserved it (5118)

On 12/23/2012 at 1:02am - misc - by oh my son - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I asked my girlfriend to marry me. She pretended not to hear me. FML

#20413271
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52360) - you deserved it (4714)

On 12/22/2012 at 7:50am - love - by anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my husband told my mother-in-law that we're trying to have a baby. She decided to call me and explain in extreme detail what positions to try, and when. FML

#20403715
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42506) - you deserved it (4692)

On 12/17/2012 at 1:48pm - intimacy - by crazy mother in law (woman) -

Today, it was my first time at the club. I saw a really cute girl. I finally worked up the courage to ask her to dance. Before I even got within five feet of her, she looked me in the eyes and vehemently shook her head. I did a 180. My friends saw everything. They are still laughing. FML

#20413213
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38062) - you deserved it (4347)

On 12/22/2012 at 6:21am - misc - by divingconfidence (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I had to break up with my boyfriend when I caught him installing cameras in my bathroom. FML

#20403401
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40652) - you deserved it (4340)

On 12/17/2012 at 7:25am - love - by Sarah (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was wrapping presents for my daughter, trying to be really quiet. Behind me, the cat decided to climb the tree, which then fell on top of me and I couldn't move. My daughter had to help me up. She now knows everything she's getting for Christmas this year. FML

#20417111
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30244) - you deserved it (4335)

On 12/23/2012 at 8:03pm - animals - by Christmas sucks - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found my diary on my mother's nightstand. Bookmarked. FML

#20417856
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42449) - you deserved it (4295)

On 12/24/2012 at 1:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, the highly intoxicated singer of my band decided it would be a wonderful idea to squat down and take a shit on stage in the middle of a gig. FML

#20408486
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37274) - you deserved it (4287)

On 12/20/2012 at 3:16am - misc - by dudeyouarefired -

Today, I once again walked in on my husband eating our cat's food. FML

#20409541
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34725) - you deserved it (4109)

On 12/20/2012 at 7:26pm - misc - by jsmills92 (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, my mother-in-law, who apparently made a copy of our house key without permission, walked in on my husband and me doing the deed. She went crazy, yelling at me for "defiling" her son. Last week, she yelled at me for not having given her grand-children yet. FML

#20405524
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59700) - you deserved it (4084)

On 12/18/2012 at 12:09pm - intimacy - by daughterinlaw (woman) - United States (Maryland)



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