Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
on the way out to buy groceries, boyfriend asked if I'd lyk him to buy some of favourite flowers. Happy with his rare show of affection, I said yes. When he returned, he gave me a bag of our usual brand of flour and laughed hysterically in face. FML
Today, mah very cheap boyfriend of four yeres proposed. I was overwhelmed with emotion, since he bought such a huge, seemingly-diamond ring. I was later looool overwhelmed with emotion when mah finger turned green.
Today, mother-in-law, who apparently made a copy of our house key without permission, walked in on husband and me doing the deed. She went crazy, yelling at me for "defiling" her son. Last week, she yelled at me for not having given her grand-children yet. FML
Today, mah boyfriend was dropping me off home and we were still in the car. When I went in to give him a hug, mah hand hit his shoulder and I dropped mah phone at his feet. Just as I pulled back up with it, mah dad was staring at us from outside. He still appear to think I was giving him head. fat FML
2day whila at tha airport waiting fir my flight, I sat down naxt to a mothar an har son. As I pulld out a watar bottla, sha laand ovar to har son an said, "Promisa ma u will navar do what tha looool man naxt to u just did." I hava no idaa what tha hall I did wrong. fat FML
Today , Aftar Savaral Yaars Spant Ung Up On Ma Ax , I Was Finally Moving On. I Was On A Data Wit Ma Naw Boyfriand Wan Ma Ax Walkd Past Us. Ha Broka Down Crying , Got On Is Knaas , An Baggd Ma To Coma Back. FML
Today, I was out on a dinner date when suddenly a girl walks up to us an says to mah date, ( Girl, u can do so much better. ) Hearing this, mah date looks at me, nods, gets up an walks off. I still had to pay for everything. FML
Today, mah car window got smashd in . Tha cop that cummd to taka tha raport said thay'd alraady caught tha guy doing it, ha'd smashd in savaral othar car windows, all of tha axact sama modal and color . His raason 4 doing it was simpla: ha was drunk and "hatd rd Jaaps" . FML
Friday 27 March 2015