Thursday 29 November 2012 
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Today, I got a call from my boyfriend saying I needed to come home immediately. When I got there, he informed me that the reason I needed to rush home from work was because he wiped a booger on the wall and it was in the shape of a penis. He said it's a sign, like when people see Jesus in toast. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15117) - you deserved it (2020)
On 12/03/2012 at 7:38pm - misc - by FlyingFist - United States
Today, my husband quit his job as a university professor and picked up the graveyard shift at a rat farm so he could have more time during the day to play World of Warcraft. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23580) - you deserved it (1979)
On 11/28/2012 at 1:32am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, it's our third anniversary. After a candlelit dinner and a midnight boat ride, my wife turned down sex, because "it's too cliché." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23399) - you deserved it (1921)
On 11/26/2012 at 12:45am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I decided to be responsible and call a cab to take my drunk ass home from the bar. As I climbed into the cab, I was quickly pulled back out and had the shit beaten out of me by a group of drunk guys who thought they needed the ride more. The police soon arrived and arrested us all. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19881) - you deserved it (1904)
On 11/26/2012 at 6:11pm - misc - by ronboy - United States (Ohio)
Today, I ran into my high school crush at Target. When I asked her if she remembered me, she patted me on the head, said, "Unfortunately," and walked away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17260) - you deserved it (1903)
On 12/04/2012 at 8:06pm - misc - by Likian5 (man) - United States
Today, I came home from the hospital diagnosed with high blood pressure. It's caused by stress. My wife had a very long talk with my son about it. All the kid has been doing for the past 2 hours is scream at his Playstation. I'd rather be at the hospital. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13151) - you deserved it (1871)
On 12/02/2012 at 11:03pm - kids - by Nick (man) - United States (Nevada)
Today, I had some soup that my dad made. I took one sip and found he had put tons of hot sauce in it. I rushed to drink from a soda can sitting on the counter, only to find that my mom had used it as an ash tray the night before. I can still taste the hot sauce, and the ash. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18235) - you deserved it (1866)
On 11/26/2012 at 3:13pm - misc - by Autocorrected - Philippines (Manila)
Today, the battery cables on my car came loose, thus resetting my car's electronics to factory settings. The anti-theft system is now turned on, and I can't start my car with it on. Luckily, it turns off with a remote. The remote broke about six months ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13329) - you deserved it (1865)
On 11/29/2012 at 9:45am - misc - by pdin222 (man) - United States
Today, I gave a homeless man my last bit of spare change so he could get on the bus. Just as I was about to get on too, I realized I'd lost my bus card. I had to get off the bus and watch as the man waved at me through the window. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17110) - you deserved it (1842)
On 12/05/2012 at 3:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I finally summoned the courage to ask my dad to pay me as he promised, after I cut the lawn and cleaned all the house windows last week. His response was, "Get fucked." FML
I agree, your life sucks (15466) - you deserved it (1841)
On 12/02/2012 at 8:57pm - misc - by :/ (woman) - United States (California)
Today, while I was removing my makeup with my boyfriend watching, he mentioned that he used to think girls were prettier without makeup on, but he'd now changed his mind. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18704) - you deserved it (1813)
On 12/01/2012 at 6:54pm - love - by allbrokeup (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)
Today, at a talent show, my band got booed before we even started playing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14680) - you deserved it (1812)
On 12/02/2012 at 9:26pm - misc - by disembob - United Kingdom
Today, my friend spilt orange juice all over my iPad. She then went ahead to clean it off by rinsing it with water. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19882) - you deserved it (1784)
On 12/02/2012 at 5:16am - misc - by Ashley - United States (California)
Monday 20 May 2013
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