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Tuesday 27 November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I realized that the comforting, unique scent of my mother in my childhood was actually the smell of the marijuana she smokes. FML

#20184714
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20873) - you deserved it (2061)

On 11/29/2012 at 10:35pm - misc - by childhoodupinsmoke (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I caught the train into the city. Halfway there some kids hopped on smelling of marijuana and alcohol. Their topic of discussion? How much pubic hair they had. FML

#20183521
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14854) - you deserved it (2049)

On 11/29/2012 at 12:40am - kids - by fabs1171 - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I got a call from my boyfriend saying I needed to come home immediately. When I got there, he informed me that the reason I needed to rush home from work was because he wiped a booger on the wall and it was in the shape of a penis. He said it's a sign, like when people see Jesus in toast. FML

#20189885
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15118) - you deserved it (2021)

On 12/03/2012 at 7:38pm - misc - by FlyingFist - United States

Today, my husband quit his job as a university professor and picked up the graveyard shift at a rat farm so he could have more time during the day to play World of Warcraft. FML

#20182185
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23584) - you deserved it (1979)

On 11/28/2012 at 1:32am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, it's our third anniversary. After a candlelit dinner and a midnight boat ride, my wife turned down sex, because "it's too cliché." FML

#20179174
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23416) - you deserved it (1922)

On 11/26/2012 at 12:45am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I decided to be responsible and call a cab to take my drunk ass home from the bar. As I climbed into the cab, I was quickly pulled back out and had the shit beaten out of me by a group of drunk guys who thought they needed the ride more. The police soon arrived and arrested us all. FML

#20180075
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19881) - you deserved it (1904)

On 11/26/2012 at 6:11pm - misc - by ronboy - United States (Ohio)

Today, I ran into my high school crush at Target. When I asked her if she remembered me, she patted me on the head, said, "Unfortunately," and walked away. FML

#20191408
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17264) - you deserved it (1903)

On 12/04/2012 at 8:06pm - misc - by Likian5 (man) - United States

Today, I came home from the hospital diagnosed with high blood pressure. It's caused by stress. My wife had a very long talk with my son about it. All the kid has been doing for the past 2 hours is scream at his Playstation. I'd rather be at the hospital. FML

#20188739
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13151) - you deserved it (1870)

On 12/02/2012 at 11:03pm - kids - by Nick (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I had some soup that my dad made. I took one sip and found he had put tons of hot sauce in it. I rushed to drink from a soda can sitting on the counter, only to find that my mom had used it as an ash tray the night before. I can still taste the hot sauce, and the ash. FML

#20179829
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18236) - you deserved it (1866)

On 11/26/2012 at 3:13pm - misc - by Autocorrected - Philippines (Manila)

Today, the battery cables on my car came loose, thus resetting my car's electronics to factory settings. The anti-theft system is now turned on, and I can't start my car with it on. Luckily, it turns off with a remote. The remote broke about six months ago. FML

Today, I finally summoned the courage to ask my dad to pay me as he promised, after I cut the lawn and cleaned all the house windows last week. His response was, "Get fucked." FML

#20188543
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15467) - you deserved it (1841)

On 12/02/2012 at 8:57pm - misc - by :/ (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while I was removing my makeup with my boyfriend watching, he mentioned that he used to think girls were prettier without makeup on, but he'd now changed his mind. FML

#20187008
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18712) - you deserved it (1813)

On 12/01/2012 at 6:54pm - love - by allbrokeup (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, at a talent show, my band got booed before we even started playing. FML

#20188582
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14682) - you deserved it (1812)

On 12/02/2012 at 9:26pm - misc - by disembob - United Kingdom



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Monday 20 May 2013

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