Tuesday 20 November 2012 
Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time
Today, I called off my engagement, after finding out my fiancé is cheating on me. I recently started a new job, and in anticipation of getting married, I asked that my username include his surname. They can't be changed, so now I get to log in every day under that sorry bastard's surname. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18885) - you deserved it (6065)
On 11/20/2012 at 12:22pm - love - by notAMrs (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I have a final for my precalculus class. After hours of studying this week, I felt pretty optimistic. Until I got to class and realized that I'd forgotten my calculator. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16956) - you deserved it (5683)
On 11/21/2012 at 1:16pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Arizona)
Today, a few of my friends and I went laser tagging. I had been smart enough to wear black since I know white glows in the dark. Unfortunately, the dandruff glowing in my hair gave me away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14058) - you deserved it (5651)
On 11/27/2012 at 12:06am - misc - by tarlyo2012 - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was blessed with a girlfriend who loves giving blowjobs. And cursed with a girlfriend who is also somehow really bad at them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21284) - you deserved it (5422)
On 11/22/2012 at 8:19pm - intimacy - by Janitoro (man) - United States
Today, I was in a public toilet, enduring an extremely awkward silence between myself and the person in the next stall. In my rush to get out of there, I managed to get my ass stuck in the toilet seat, and ended up being pulled out by the maintenance men. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13084) - you deserved it (5268)
On 11/25/2012 at 1:56am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was enjoying a nice bath, when one of my cats jumped up on the rim and started purring. I thought it was sweet, until my other cat ran in and body-slammed the first into the tub with me. Being a conscientious cat owner, I hadn't de-clawed them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16162) - you deserved it (4986)
On 11/27/2012 at 2:52pm - animals - by Neutered (man) - United States (Alaska)
Today, I decided to go meet up with a guy that I met online for the first time. All he could talk about was how he expects me to "clean, cook, and submit" my body for sex at least twice a day when we get married. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17171) - you deserved it (4800)
On 11/22/2012 at 4:39am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I ran across the street due to a line of cars waiting for me to cross. Just as I reached the other side, my iPhone slipped out of my hand and fell into the road, just in time to get run over by multiple cars, one after the other. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15095) - you deserved it (4749)
On 11/27/2012 at 1:45pm - misc - by unknown - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, I was playing with my four year old cousin. He had a toy whale and said, "Shark!" I corrected him and told him it was a whale. He picked it up, threw it at my face, and yelled, "SHAAARK!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (12437) - you deserved it (4722)
On 11/24/2012 at 8:59am - kids - by Anonymous - United States
Today, in break from tradition, I proposed to my boyfriend. We were at a Japanese Pagoda. Water was trickling everywhere; the moment was perfect. While I was on my knee, after pouring my heart out, he looked wistfully out over the water and said, "So, I was thinking pizza tonight." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20969) - you deserved it (4206)
On 11/22/2012 at 11:13am - love - by but I tried anal and everything (woman) - United States (Iowa)
Today, I tried to motivate my 9-year-old sister to clean her room. She said she'd only agree if she could kill me. Thinking she was just kidding around, and not a total psychopath, I said sure. She ran to her room shouting, "Yes! I'm gonna use the big knife!" She's still cleaning now. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17988) - you deserved it (3707)
On 11/21/2012 at 2:34pm - kids - by anon - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, I've now worked on Thanksgiving, Black Friday, the weekend after that, and two days this week. My husband and son have had all that time off, and yet I've still ended up having to clean the dishes and the house after them on all of these days. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18847) - you deserved it (3661)
On 11/27/2012 at 1:05pm - work - by bored - United States
Today, I realized I'd put on my shirt on inside out, so I went to the bathroom stalls to fix it. As I was taking it off, I accidentally dropped it in the toilet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21413) - you deserved it (3604)
On 11/19/2012 at 4:08pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
