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Tuesday 20 November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my girlfriend looked me straight in the eye and said, "I know about the sea turtles." I asked her what she was talking about and she said, "Next time, shut up or I'll show you pain." I have no idea what she's talking about. FML

#20170012
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14508) - you deserved it (1242)

On 11/19/2012 at 8:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I got into a car accident. The guy wouldn't give me his information, but instead stood there saying, "Like a good neighbor, Statefarm is there." FML

#20176033
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19835) - you deserved it (1209)

On 11/24/2012 at 12:55am - misc - by Read The Fine Print - United States (California)

Today, a shopper approached me at Target and said, "So are you just gonna stand there to look pretty and do nothing around here?" I ignored his comment, until he got so upset that he wanted to speak to my manager. It would have been understandable if I actually worked there. FML

#20177780
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19719) - you deserved it (1206)

On 11/25/2012 at 4:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I fell off my boyfriend's motorcycle. I had a few scrapes and bruises, and my boyfriend called for an ambulance as a precaution. The paramedics managed to drop me on my head. FML

#20177257
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19637) - you deserved it (1164)

On 11/24/2012 at 9:35pm - health - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my cat went into labor. This is surprising since 6 years ago, we paid to have her spayed. FML

#20174337
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17469) - you deserved it (1089)

On 11/22/2012 at 8:34pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, I've been on duty at the hospital for just three hours so far, and I've already pulled five carving forks out of four different people. Good job, everybody. FML

#20174027
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17406) - you deserved it (1018)

On 11/22/2012 at 4:03pm - work - by DocFUCKINGHATESSTUPIDPEOPLE (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was rejected for a dream photography job that involves travelling all over the world, because according to the interviewer, half the photos in my nature portfolio were "blatantly photoshopped." I guess reality isn't realistic enough for some people. FML

#20175687
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18255) - you deserved it (1014)

On 11/23/2012 at 8:29pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, after having finally kicked my insomnia's ass after three hours, I was woken up by something I only thought happened in movies. Someone had paid for a Mariachi band to play for their girlfriend, outside my apartment, in the middle of the night. FML

#20175516
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17208) - you deserved it (1002)

On 11/23/2012 at 5:51pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I have an ear infection. The pain from it radiates from my ear all the way down the left side of my face, so my doctor prescribed me something that makes half of my face numb and pretty much unusable. Tomorrow, I have to give a presentation on strokes for my med class. Go figure. FML

#20170659
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17143) - you deserved it (975)

On 11/20/2012 at 5:41am - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I got laid off. Why would they lay me off right before the holidays? Because they want to make sure every one else gets a nice holiday bonus. FML

#20173186
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17341) - you deserved it (953)

On 11/21/2012 at 11:31pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, my husband ran a nice warm bubble bath with extra bubbles. I undressed and slid down into the tub only to have the most ungodly pain go up my backside. Turns out he knocked his razor into the water when he added the bubbles. I now have two butt cracks. FML

#20181043
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20847) - you deserved it (941)

On 11/27/2012 at 9:32am - misc - by Cracky - United States (Maryland)

Today, a customer at the Walmart I work at had a hissy fit and began throwing merchandise everywhere, including at my face, because we are Canadian and don't have a show called "Extreme Couponing" for "devoted shoppers" like her. FML

#20181556
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13455) - you deserved it (932)

On 11/27/2012 at 6:46pm - work - by ohgodwhy - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I caught my mother trying to switch my contraceptive pill for Tic Tacs. I don't know what's worse - how far she will go to have a grandchild, or that she thought I wouldn't notice that my birth control left me with minty fresh breath. FML

#20178576
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16380) - you deserved it (896)

On 11/25/2012 at 6:36pm - misc - by Username (woman) - United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne)



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