Sunday 18 November 2012 
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Today, my ex-girlfriend was supposed to pick up her things. I decided to take a nap. Thirty minutes later, I woke up with two police officers hammering on my door. They'd come to get my ex-girlfriend's things and said they were "watching me." That's the last time I date a cop's daughter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16111) - you deserved it (1970)
On 11/20/2012 at 12:03am - love - by Chris (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I walked into my house with my friend, only to discover my husband half-naked and yelling at the TV screen over a soccer game. By half-naked, I mean he was only wearing a shirt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16746) - you deserved it (1946)
On 11/19/2012 at 2:44pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, my parents kindly told me what they are getting me for my 18th birthday. An eviction notice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13627) - you deserved it (1941)
On 11/20/2012 at 1:47am - kids - by lea5459 - United States (Oregon)
Today, on my way to school, I was shouted at by an obnoxious businessman for sitting down on the train when a "full fare paying passenger" was standing. I would normally have given him the seat straight away, except I have a broken leg. I showed him my leg and crutches. He still made me get up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18539) - you deserved it (1913)
On 11/12/2012 at 1:50am - health - by myleghurts (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I spotted a girl I have a crush on while grocery shopping. Before I could go over and say hi, I noticed her walk over and stroke a few kitchen knives through plastic wrapping. Then I spotted her in the dog food section sniffing rawhide bones with her eyes closed, looking very happy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15419) - you deserved it (1892)
On 11/16/2012 at 12:58am - misc - by grocerystalker (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I took a crowded train home. I was holding on to the rail when an old man started rubbing his crotch across my hand. I moved my hand but he moved too and kept doing it. When I moved my hand higher, he started licking it. I had to wait ten minutes for the next stop. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18076) - you deserved it (1879)
On 11/15/2012 at 9:40pm - misc - by needanewride - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I had a sex dream, which I interrupted by having an OCD-induced panic attack because apparently we weren't using protection. My brain won't even let me enjoy the fantasy action I get in my sleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19481) - you deserved it (1873)
On 11/21/2012 at 12:48am - intimacy - by Dead_Fox (man) - United States (Arkansas)
Today, my girlfriend of 6 months yelled at me for not comforting her while she was crying because her ex got a new girlfriend, and "it's just not fair." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23993) - you deserved it (1858)
On 11/19/2012 at 2:13am - love - by they've been broken up for a year. - United States (Texas)
Today, a co-worker asked me if I have a Facebook account, and I said I do. I had to politely smile as he spent the next half hour insulting me for supposedly being glued to it 24/7, before claiming that it's all a CIA front to steal people's social security details. Why are nutjobs like this even alive? FML
I agree, your life sucks (11992) - you deserved it (1808)
On 11/23/2012 at 7:49pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I came home to find that my girlfriend had repainted my bedroom. As she had offered to do it, it shouldn't have been a problem. However, she decided to return the several unopened cans of off-white paint that I'd bought for something "more neutral." Like "Sunset Orange." FML
I agree, your life sucks (13422) - you deserved it (1778)
On 11/16/2012 at 12:51am - misc - by spaceforrent - United States
Today, I found out the can of spray paint I got at Walmart yesterday has no spray nozzle, rendering it useless. I'm working on a project that needs to be done by the weekend, so I get to go wait in a huge line and risk being trampled to death tonight just to exchange one damn spray paint can. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13945) - you deserved it (1764)
On 11/22/2012 at 9:56pm - misc - by Unfortunate Painter - United States (California)
Today, after clubbing with my girlfriend, we went to her place. She then threw up on the floor, and went to clean herself up. When she came back, she'd forgotten that she'd just thrown up. She blamed me for puking, and kicked me out. It was 4:00 am and a 3-hour walk home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19094) - you deserved it (1749)
On 11/13/2012 at 7:02am - love - by Med (man) - Netherlands (Groningen)
Today, I was walking through a crosswalk when a lady in a car looked at me with a horrified expression and then hit her door locks repeatedly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17089) - you deserved it (1744)
On 11/24/2012 at 11:35am - misc - by lobstercola - Canada (Alberta)
Monday 20 May 2013
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