Sunday 4 November 2012 
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Today, my dog and I were sitting on the couch. I went to the bathroom, came back, and saw him walk over the remote, which caused the TV to change to the Hustler channel, just a few moments before my girlfriend walked through the door. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14418) - you deserved it (2126)
On 11/10/2012 at 1:51am - animals - by Sam l. - United States
Today, I told my dad and brother that I want to take Zumba classes. My brother said, "Did you hear that? Pumbaa wants to Zumba!" Then he starting dancing and making pig noises. My dad high-fived him. When my mom heard, she high-fived him too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18150) - you deserved it (2104)
On 10/31/2012 at 6:06am - misc - by hakuna matata - United States (California)
Today, I found out that not only is my girlfriend enough of a superstitious twat to believe the world is going to end on December 21st, she actually thinks it's an acceptable excuse to go sleep around with other men. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22066) - you deserved it (2049)
On 11/03/2012 at 8:37pm - love - by markderanjer (man) - United Kingdom (Ealing)
Today, my boyfriend of a year broke up with me by saying, "It's not you, it's me. I have a terrible taste in women." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20969) - you deserved it (2046)
On 10/30/2012 at 9:27am - love - by LonelyMe -
Today, after being a germaphobe for almost ten years and refusing to go out to restaurants because of it, I finally had the courage to face my fear, and went to dinner with my family. After three bites into my salad, I found a dead bug in it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22172) - you deserved it (2007)
On 11/06/2012 at 1:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my company had a Halloween party. I was so excited seeing as our company never does anything, so I pulled out all the stops with my costume. I was the only one who got dressed up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16636) - you deserved it (2001)
On 11/02/2012 at 8:17am - work - by PieterseMJ - South Africa (Gauteng)
Today, I had my first orgasm. I also came to the realization that whenever I orgasm I get an uncontrollable case of hiccups for at least half an hour afterwards. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18428) - you deserved it (1953)
On 11/03/2012 at 11:52am - intimacy - by hiccups - United States (New York)
Today, my daughter brought home her new boyfriend. He has a neck tattoo, and his life's dream is to be a professional "beer pong" player. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18653) - you deserved it (1947)
On 11/04/2012 at 1:30am - kids - by PleaseDontBeSerious - Canada
Today, my manager made me stay at work for an extra four hours, making me miss an urgent specialist appointment I'd scheduled months ago. Why? Because her neighbor's dog was having puppies, and she wanted to go home early and see them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17302) - you deserved it (1945)
On 11/02/2012 at 1:53am - work - by whytetrash - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I was woken up by my husband attempting to breastfeed off my lactating nipples. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16521) - you deserved it (1943)
On 10/29/2012 at 6:22pm - misc - by Indianagirl94 (woman) - United States
Today, I got my wisdom teeth removed. My girlfriend had agreed to come over after and make sure I was okay, so I called her, saying I was done. She told me she'd made new plans, and to "just suck on a tampon, you pussy". FML
I agree, your life sucks (15275) - you deserved it (1940)
On 11/09/2012 at 7:16pm - health - by dating a fking cnt (man) - Canada
Today, I witnessed my girlfriend slowly floss her teeth, and then eat what showed up on the floss. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18096) - you deserved it (1911)
On 11/04/2012 at 4:16pm - misc - by i fking love docb - Virgin Islands, U.S.
Today, I was handing candy to a little boy who was trick or treating by himself. He was small enough to grab the candy and run past me into my house. I've been searching my house for two hours and still can't find him. I'm afraid to go to sleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27013) - you deserved it (1893)
On 10/31/2012 at 11:04pm - kids - by ananymous - United States (New York)
Monday 17 June 2013
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