Monday 25 June 2012 
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Today, I exchanged pictures with a guy I met online, whose devotion to his family really impressed me. In his picture, he was wearing clown makeup, holding a huge knife to his throat with one hand, and an ICP album in the other. All this with a psychopathic grin on his face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13367) - you deserved it (5277)
On 07/01/2012 at 6:57pm - misc - by probablydeadbymidnight (woman) - United States
Today, after three months of them dating, I finally met the guy my best friend claims she's in love with. To my horror, she's dating the douchebag that I had a one-night stand with a week ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26158) - you deserved it (4465)
On 06/28/2012 at 10:20am - intimacy - by … (woman) - United States
Today, I let my daughter bake a cake for her brother's fifth birthday party. She showed up later with a cake in the shape of a cock and balls. Apparently it's okay, though, because "I frosted it to look like a rocket, hehehe!" I can't believe my balls spawned this moron. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15832) - you deserved it (4460)
On 06/29/2012 at 5:39pm - misc - by Nick (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, while walking around my college campus, I passed by a dorm where a drunk guy was peeing out one of the top floor windows while his drunk friends cheered him on. That guy is my boyfriend. Lucky me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13730) - you deserved it (4454)
On 07/02/2012 at 9:53pm - misc - by 21! (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my dog was licking the dishes in the dishwasher when his collar got stuck on it. Then he got scared of the dishwasher rack following him and ran away really fast. Now I have no dishes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14341) - you deserved it (4408)
On 06/28/2012 at 1:20am - animals - by lala8940 - United States
Today, my daughter told me that she wanted to live with her father because they have a faster internet connection. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20197) - you deserved it (4025)
On 07/01/2012 at 12:00pm - kids - by grrr1234 -
Today, in a drunken, depressed state I thought I heard my deceased mother trying to make contact with me from beyond the grave. It took me a moment to realise that the soft voice was from the music my neighbours were playing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12507) - you deserved it (4007)
On 06/25/2012 at 10:59pm - misc - by hearingthings (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, I slammed my middle finger in a drawer. I screamed and my mom came running into the kitchen. She asked me what was wrong, so without thinking I stuck up my middle finger. She hasn't spoken to me since this morning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18644) - you deserved it (3824)
On 06/26/2012 at 2:05am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my dad was helping my fiancé and me move. On the way, someone sideswiped the trailer. When the police came, we found my dad had a suspended license, no insurance, and a broken tail light. No one else could drive a manual, so we were stuck in a parking lot for 3 hours. Thanks, dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12085) - you deserved it (3661)
On 07/02/2012 at 9:20pm - misc - by thanksdad (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I found out just how easy it is to be launched against the wall and sucker-punched into oblivion by a 200-pound former Marine turned professional body-builder. I discovered this after I told my fiancée's dad that we were expecting a baby. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19947) - you deserved it (3566)
On 06/29/2012 at 7:57pm - health - by fuckjuggalos (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I finally achieved the perfect hourglass figure. Too bad I'm a guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15839) - you deserved it (3541)
On 06/25/2012 at 10:05am - misc - by Wwiimaniac (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I had to have a long and awkward meeting with my boss. It wouldn't have been too awkward though, if I didn't have to avoid staring at her exposed breast whilst she fed her 8 week old baby. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17316) - you deserved it (3495)
On 06/27/2012 at 6:32am - work - by Wubba87 (man) - United Kingdom (Liverpool)
Today, not only does my cat rabidly attack my face if I don't let him sleep on my pillow, but he snores too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12266) - you deserved it (3480)
On 07/01/2012 at 12:30am - animals - by emi -
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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