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January 2015

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, in an attempt to be romantic, I kissed my husband as passionately as I could. After, he looked at me and said, "You taste like Chinese food." FML

#21330815
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25002) - you deserved it (4367)

On 01/04/2015 at 6:14pm - love - by TimJack18 - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my parents threatened to take away my college funds. Why? Because I complained about my 10 pm curfew during break as a freshman in college. FML

#21339229
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29455) - you deserved it (4356)

On 01/17/2015 at 10:50pm - money - by sophiae123 - United States (Michigan)

Today, at dinner, my downstair's neighbors described how they can listen to most of my movements, including the buzz of my phone when I text late at night. I think all of us knew it is not my phone that vibrates at that time. FML

#21343273
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27470) - you deserved it (4347)

On 01/24/2015 at 2:57am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my cat had the bright idea of giving birth in the dryer, on top of all my new white towels. FML

#21344486
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21394) - you deserved it (4350)

On 01/26/2015 at 10:21am - animals - by HannaMD - Canada

Today, I finally noticed after months of having the same cover photo on several websites, that it looks like I have a bushel of armpit hair due to a shadow. FML

#21331000
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25033) - you deserved it (4280)

On 01/04/2015 at 11:30pm - misc - by pits (woman) -

Today, my girlfriend was making lunch and asked me to pass her the peanut butter. I'll never know why, but as I handed it to her I said the first thing that came to mind: "I really want a dog." She looked at me in horror, then told me to get out of her house. FML

#21334531
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24102) - you deserved it (4257)

On 01/10/2015 at 3:00pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, while breast feeding my 7 month old before his nap, I hummed his favorite song as I rocked. He pulled away, stared at me, and cried til I shut up. FML

#21342394
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25546) - you deserved it (4228)

On 01/22/2015 at 5:36pm - kids - by ameliaruth09 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, while trying to take a crap, I shut the bathroom door. A minute later, my 3 year old daughter knocked and said "Mommy, do you wanna build a snowman?" She kept singing the song until I was finally done. FML

#21341221
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29485) - you deserved it (4208)

On 01/20/2015 at 9:05pm - kids - by frozenpoo - United States

Today, after paying a job coach a load of money for his services, pretty much the only advice he gave me was "Send out more résumés." FML

#21333885
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24555) - you deserved it (4194)

On 01/09/2015 at 11:30am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I decided to use an at-home waxing kit for the first time to get rid of the hair on my upper lip. After experiencing the trauma of waxing, I fell asleep. A few hours later, I woke up to see that I now have acne everywhere I had waxed. I have an acne mustache. FML

#21340725
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27881) - you deserved it (4087)

On 01/20/2015 at 1:14am - misc - by iamamermaid (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went on a road trip with my boyfriend and his best friend. What I thought was going to be a great, fun time ended up with me alone in a car with two large men who wouldn't stop farting for 14 hours. FML

#21328432
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26160) - you deserved it (4079)

On 01/01/2015 at 3:52am - misc - by sandwhiched - United States (California)

Today, when my roommate asked me what was wrong, I told him that something I ate was making me feel sick. He works 10+ hours a day, and I didn't have the heart to tell him that the putrid smell of his feet was making me nauseous. FML

#21329068
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28352) - you deserved it (4075)

On 01/02/2015 at 12:36am - misc - by jitterbug (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, my asshat roommate tricked me into eating a weed brownie. I thought it was his terrible attempt at baking regular brownies until it kicked in at college. I was so high, I started giggling like a schoolgirl when my instructor said "Dickens". Now everyone thinks I'm a retard. FML

#21342882
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29086) - you deserved it (4061)

On 01/23/2015 at 1:12pm - misc - by Annomymous (man) - United States (Washington)



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