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September 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my roommate asked for my opinion of her new painting. The same painting I hand-painted for over ten hours. She apparently thought it was a gift. She won't give it back. FML

#21251580
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36475) - you deserved it (2884)

On 09/04/2014 at 12:46am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out that my girlfriend takes videos of me sleeping and watches them with her friends. FML

#21250632
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34735) - you deserved it (2878)

On 09/02/2014 at 5:29pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I discovered that one of our cats is super creepy. He humps the blankets on my mother's bed while staring at her while she's sleeping. FML

#21257305
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33592) - you deserved it (2869)

On 09/13/2014 at 2:56am - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my horrible boss sent me a Facebook friend request for the fifth time, in her attempt to not only bother me at work, but also through social media. FML

#21254692
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31819) - you deserved it (2858)

On 09/08/2014 at 9:26pm - work - by notyourfriend (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I started a new job. Three of my Kenyan coworkers keep getting together and reminding me that having more than one wife is okay in their country. I've gotten 3 marriage proposals from married men so far. FML

#21255696
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33002) - you deserved it (2809)

On 09/10/2014 at 1:16pm - work - by notmarryingyou - United States (Washington)

Today, while fishing my remote out from behind the couch, I found my fiancé's stash of old toenails. FML

#21257075
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31444) - you deserved it (2819)

On 09/12/2014 at 6:27pm - misc - by jjhach (woman) - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, someone in my class referred to the September 11th attacks as "Nine-Elevs". FML

#21255951
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33899) - you deserved it (2802)

On 09/10/2014 at 9:47pm - misc - by no - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my roommate came back from camping. My toothbrush magically reappeared as well. FML

#21250056
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34574) - you deserved it (2793)

On 09/01/2014 at 9:53pm - health - by germophobe (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I work at a bakery. As I was putting out some cakes with fruit on top of them, a customer asked me how we get the little hairs to stay on the raspberries, and if we glue them on. FML

#21249886
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32745) - you deserved it (2775)

On 09/01/2014 at 5:37pm - work - by s0728 - United States (Texas)

Today, a middle-aged customer tried to pay for a $2 ice cream bar with a credit card. It was declined, so he made me swipe it again. Declined. "Quit touching the metal strip," he scowled. I held the outer edge of it and swiped. Declined. He then bitched me out as his mother paid for him. FML

Today, my husband and I broke the news that I'm pregnant. Our 8-year-old son's reactions so far have been crying inconsolably, trying to punch me in the stomach, and swearing that he won't let me give him a brother or sister. FML

#21259449
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24426) - you deserved it (2763)

On 09/16/2014 at 1:44pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, my daughter came home in tears, completely distraught. It took half an hour to convince her to tell me what was wrong. What horrific thing happened to her? One of her friends wore the same outfit as her to the movies, and apparently that's a betrayal of their friendship. FML

#21258796
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29633) - you deserved it (2749)

On 09/15/2014 at 1:52pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I found out my fiancée's been cheating on me. Her excuse? Her ADHD made her do it. FML

#21257049
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35993) - you deserved it (2728)

On 09/12/2014 at 5:36pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)



FML's blog

  • Matteor's illustrated FML #2
  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

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