Today, my wife uttered the soul-crushing words, "But we're married now, why would we have sex?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (63206) - you deserved it (5773)
On 06/04/2013 at 8:08pm - intimacy - by ._. (man) - United Kingdom (Bedfordshire)
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me for not remembering our anniversary. Our three week anniversary. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50891) - you deserved it (5743)
On 06/03/2013 at 12:31am - love - by BadBoyfriend - United States (Texas)
Today, I took my pet rabbit to the vet because I had noticed his genitals looked swollen compared to my other rabbit's. It turns out he's just "gifted". The vet laughed at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36969) - you deserved it (5705)
On 06/11/2013 at 10:00am - animals - by Rjlup - United States (Colorado)
Today, after dating for almost a year, I decided to introduce my parents to the man I was sure I'd fallen in love with. When dad saw him, his and my boyfriend's face completely dropped. I asked them what was wrong because I could feel the discomfort. Turns out, I'm dating my dad's drug dealer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (57599) - you deserved it (5676)
On 06/14/2013 at 2:48am - love - by explanations (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I went on my first ever assisted skydive. I fainted after we jumped, and only came to as we touched the ground. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40013) - you deserved it (5450) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 06/02/2013 at 7:14pm - health - by Fuperman - France (Lorraine)
Today, I was at work talking to an older man. As our conversation ended, he said, "Thank you, ma'am." Then, he quickly stumbled over his words as he said, "I mean, thank you, sir. I meant sir. I think." He gazed at me for a moment in confusion, then darted away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36969) - you deserved it (5414)
On 06/05/2013 at 12:25am - work - by SApprentice (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, my dad was teasing me, saying a guy would have to be blind to go on a date with me. I then introduced him to my new, visually impaired boyfriend. He hasn't stopped laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42925) - you deserved it (5282)
On 06/13/2013 at 8:30pm - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Southampton)
Today, I started playing softball again in a league after not playing for about 5 years. My very first time at the bat I whacked a foul ball into the parking lot and hit my own car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37131) - you deserved it (5274)
On 06/13/2013 at 7:59pm - misc - by Dingbat - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I decided to try wearing eyeshadow, even though I'm not that girly. When I asked for help after several failed attempts, my sister walked in and said, "It's easy, just do what I do." She put the makeup on herself and looked amazing. She's eight. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40669) - you deserved it (5263)
On 06/11/2013 at 12:11pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, after buying 3 new alarm clocks, I finally decided to video tape myself all night to figure out if my alarm clock was broken or if I was oversleeping. Turns out I wake up around 4am each day and turn them off without remembering. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45379) - you deserved it (5243)
On 06/02/2013 at 2:06am - misc - by sleepy momma - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I saw a man on my bike that was stolen a few years ago. I asked him if I could have my bike back just wondering what he'd say. He calmly replied, "Hell no, I stole this fair and square." FML
I agree, your life sucks (49704) - you deserved it (5173)
On 06/06/2013 at 12:14am - misc - by anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I woke up at 5:30 and made the half hour drive to work only to find out that it was my day off. After finally getting back home and into bed, my boss called, requesting that I come back to work since I was "already up". FML
I agree, your life sucks (39637) - you deserved it (5035)
On 06/15/2013 at 1:41am - work - by Shitty Boss Shitty Job - United States (Iowa)
Today, I received a prank phone call that woke me up. I actually kept them on the line because they were the first person to call me in weeks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41926) - you deserved it (4923)
On 06/04/2013 at 3:11am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)
Monday 17 June 2013
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