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March 2015

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I got a call from the ICU. Apparently, my boyfriend has been there for 3 days and I'm the only person who didn't know. Even my parents have been to see him. FML

#21378357
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30133) - you deserved it (4757)

On 03/20/2015 at 11:40am - health - by quietecho95 - United States (Colorado)

Today, after many tests and doctor visits, I finally found out the reason for my flu-like symptoms isn't a vitamin deficient or anything. The damn tea I drink every morning makes me feel sick. FML

Today, after telling my parents that I want to be a vegetarian, I got grounded. Apparently, "black people can't be vegetarians" and, I'm "crazy for even suggesting something like that." FML

#21378047
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31743) - you deserved it (4582)

On 03/19/2015 at 10:23pm - misc - by shawnsmuffins - United States (Florida)

Today, the principal of the school I teach at told me she's not interested in re-hiring me because sometimes I wear a hoodie. FML

#21371721
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29419) - you deserved it (4569)

On 03/10/2015 at 7:28am - work - by schoolsucks - United States (Colorado)

Today, at a music festival, some douche unzipped the back of my skirt, exposing my Ninja Turtle undies to everyone before running off. FML

#21369215
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30821) - you deserved it (4501)

On 03/06/2015 at 9:03am - misc - by no touching - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my husband used the vacuum cleaner. Proud of him for this first-ever initiative, I congratulated him. His second initiative was to stick the nozzle on my ass, yelling, "Liposuction!" FML

#21380706
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27233) - you deserved it (4480) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/24/2015 at 8:58am - love - by chassezlenaturel (woman) - Belgium

Today, I was at a big meeting at work. The CEO was reaming the hell out of us for our recent poor profits, when I accidentally let rip a vile fart. I was then subjected to a 10 minute tirade of abuse for "trying to be a funny man", and told that whatever small chance I had for a promotion is now gone. FML

#21382528
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19703) - you deserved it (4379)

On 03/27/2015 at 5:19pm - work - by screwedupfuck (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, it's been three months since my sister broke her car, meaning she couldn't get to work, and I've giving her money every month so she could buy food and so on. I just found out that her workplace is less than 200 metres from where she lives. FML

#21381106
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26523) - you deserved it (4211)

On 03/25/2015 at 1:42am - love - by Julie - Denmark (Midtjylland)

Today, my brother wore a T-shirt to my birthday party that said "I dig skinny chicks". I'm a recovering anorexic and told him that I didn't really like his shirt. His response? "Don't let the liberal media brainwash you into thinking it's OK to be fat." FML

#21376642
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32093) - you deserved it (1)

On 03/17/2015 at 8:18pm - misc - by Idigrespectfulattire (woman) - Trinidad and Tobago (Port-of-Spain)

Today, I had a dream that I was making pancakes. I need to get out more. FML

#21373068
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24796) - you deserved it (4193)

On 03/12/2015 at 9:43am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, three of my dipshit coworkers kept whining all day about Zayne Malik leaving One Direction, how devastating it is, and what it means for their future. As a pacifist, I've never had to struggle so hard to not beat the piss out of people and hurl their broken remains out a window. FML

#21381305
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28462) - you deserved it (4181)

On 03/25/2015 at 3:00pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my sister and I went to visit my grandma. She looked at my sister and said, "You are just so skinny! You need to eat more cookies!" She then turned to me and said, "You should lay off the cookies!" FML



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