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March 2015

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I got to listen to my boss lecture me about professional dress and subtly insinuate that my being on the heavier side top-wise with all the men in the office could be a problem. I've worn turtle necks for the whole two months I've been working there. FML

#21371359
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26075) - you deserved it (1907)

On 03/09/2015 at 6:59pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my 3-year-old son said to me, "Fuck a duck, Daddy." I have no idea where he heard this. FML

#21382327
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18607) - you deserved it (1901)

On 03/27/2015 at 9:29am - kids - by njh - Ireland

Today, after seven people at work approaching me and asking me if I was 'that lad from the paper', I picked one up to see what they were talking about. Turns out my doppelganger is a man who brutally murdered his older brother last year. FML

#21367159
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31977) - you deserved it (1882)

On 03/03/2015 at 9:01am - misc - by definatelynotamurderer (man) - United Kingdom

Today, my mother in law accidentally cc'd me on an email she was sending to my husband, telling him that his youth is fleeting and that he should leave me while he still has time. FML

#21373326
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29369) - you deserved it (1855)

On 03/12/2015 at 6:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I took my son to the playground and watched him have fun. Minutes later, I was being shoved around and called a pedophile because I was there alone with no wife. By the time I convinced them I was innocent, my son was bawling. FML

#21374998
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37150) - you deserved it (1808)

On 03/15/2015 at 12:11pm - kids - by pledonasm (man) - India (Maharashtra)

Today, I tore my ACL while doing physical therapy that's supposed to keep me from tearing my ACL. FML

#21381900
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24967) - you deserved it (1814)

On 03/26/2015 at 2:36pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I got fired for having a visible tattoo on my neck. The tattoo in question is a scar from a surgery I had 2 months ago. The same one paid for by my employer's insurance and missed 2 weeks of work for. FML

#21381191
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28168) - you deserved it (1741)

On 03/25/2015 at 8:23am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was told at my babysitting job that I can't bring my toddler with me. My employer is my best friend. Now I have to find a babysitter for my kid if I want to babysit hers. FML

#21382250
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19830) - you deserved it (1739)

On 03/27/2015 at 4:17am - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was at a big meeting at work. The CEO was reaming the hell out of us for our recent poor profits, when I accidentally let rip a vile fart. I was then subjected to a 10 minute tirade of abuse for "trying to be a funny man", and told that whatever small chance I had for a promotion is now gone. FML

#21382528
21 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5757) - you deserved it (1246)

On 03/27/2015 at 5:19pm - work - by screwedupfuck (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was trying out for a position as pitcher for my college baseball team. I threw the ball as hard as I could, and then collapsed to the ground in agony from a dislocated shoulder. FML

#21382575
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6256) - you deserved it (860)

On 03/27/2015 at 6:50pm - health - by Bonecrusher (man) - United States (California)

Today, I discovered that when my mom can't sleep, she comes into my room and reads my text messages. FML

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. Within minutes, they said I needed to leave. Their reason? Apparently, I was mocking her dad's speech impediment. I also have one but they wouldn't believe me. FML

#21382684
23 comments

I agree, your life sucks (1989) - you deserved it (118)

On 03/27/2015 at 10:12pm - love - by speechprobs - United States (Arizona)



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