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January 2015

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I gave a presentation to my college class about life with Tourette syndrome. I only got 3 minutes into it before my asswipe classmates started yelling stuff like "Shit!", "Cock!", and "Bob Saget!" I gave up and went back to my seat in tears as our bored instructor said "Next." FML

#21334608
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34318) - you deserved it (2345)

On 01/10/2015 at 5:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, thinking he was being so hilarious, my friend slipped me enough laxatives to make a horse shit its intestines out. I haven't been able to move from the toilet for over an hour. FML

#21341346
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29054) - you deserved it (2342)

On 01/20/2015 at 11:29pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I was walking with a female friend when suddenly, my ex-girlfriend comes running down the street and says, "So, you're cheating on me with this slut, huh?!" We've been separated for a decade now. FML

#21336664
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34399) - you deserved it (2331)

On 01/13/2015 at 10:05pm - love - by RipeFlame - United States (Florida)

Today, my scumbag landlady broke into my place and stole my mop, which I refused to give her earlier. She denied everything and tried to convince me that some criminal broke in using a key, stole only my mop, and was nice enough to lock up on the way out. FML

#21332650
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29502) - you deserved it (2330)

On 01/07/2015 at 11:29am - misc - by Anonymous - Sri Lanka

Today, my brother woke me up by trying to light my bed on fire. FML

#21334934
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28458) - you deserved it (2328)

On 01/11/2015 at 3:44am - misc - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, I gave feedback on how the store is run at the owners' request, because they don't understand why everyone keeps quitting. I guess they took it personally, because they asked me not to come back. FML

#21328814
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25103) - you deserved it (2317)

On 01/01/2015 at 6:03pm - work - by outofajob - United States (Utah)

Today, I finally got a restraining order against my violent ex. My mom now keeps finding ways to tell me how shitty I am for breaking the "poor boy's" heart and how I didn't deserve him anyway. FML

#21331330
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33636) - you deserved it (2309)

On 01/05/2015 at 1:52pm - misc - by help (woman) - Malta

Today, my girlfriend told me that her fear of PDA has gotten so bad, she doesn't think she'll even be able to kiss me on our wedding day. Her parents are going be there and she can't imagine showing affection in front of other people, let alone her parents. FML

#21342878
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26552) - you deserved it (2314)

On 01/23/2015 at 1:09pm - love - by uggg - United States (Washington)

Today, my father was playing with my son and his toy animals. He picked one up and said, "What is this? Some kind of African horse?" It was a zebra. FML

Today, at the soup kitchen I volunteer at, a guy called the food crap and threatened to shove his bowl up my ass if I didn't give him something better. FML

#21340847
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28153) - you deserved it (2268)

On 01/20/2015 at 8:23am - work - by klaatu barada nikto (man) - United States (Iowa)

Today, my 15 year old sister asked which animal rice comes from. She believed every word when my mum told her it's harvested from tiny cows in Asia. FML

#21340484
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26591) - you deserved it (2249)

On 01/19/2015 at 7:45pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I got a large envelope from a college I applied to earlier. My mom, expecting big news, made my family gather round as I opened it. It ended up being a letter of rejection from not just that school, but all 3 campuses of the state college. FML

#21342027
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28030) - you deserved it (2231)

On 01/22/2015 at 12:22am - misc - by 1415926 - United States

Today, my new roommate puked into the sink and all over the bathroom floor, before passing out on her bed. Apparently, she was awake enough to wash her own face but not clean up her vomit. We share the bathroom. This is the second time already. FML

#21336281
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27289) - you deserved it (2224)

On 01/13/2015 at 6:06am - misc - by notyourcleaner (woman) - Malaysia (Selangor)



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Thursday 22 January 2015

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