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March 2015

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, as I was closing up at my sandwich-making job when a huge bus full of basic, snobby, preppy cheerleaders came in. They literally "can't even" decide what they want. FML

Today, my boyfriend dumped me for another girl, via a text message ending with "No hard feelings. Well xcept 4 my cock obvs. ;)" Fuck you, Rick. FML

#21365892
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34029) - you deserved it (2574)

On 03/01/2015 at 1:59pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Suffolk)

Today, I asked my professor for his opinion on the subject I plan to study in my thesis. Turns out, he likes it so much that he's going to steal it from me. FML

#21372437
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33244) - you deserved it (2566)

On 03/11/2015 at 10:01am - work - by nothesisforme - France

Today, I discovered that my fiancé consistently thinks about his fear of breaking his penis while we have sex. He's afraid to have sex with me. FML

#21366308
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30516) - you deserved it (2551)

On 03/02/2015 at 12:14am - intimacy - by dickofbrokendreams - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was doing homework and I had my leg bent in a funny position. When I stood up, my hip dislocated. It was the most painful thing I've ever experienced. When people ask me what happened, I have to say I dislocated my hip doing calculus. FML

#21381072
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24733) - you deserved it (2555)

On 03/25/2015 at 12:24am - health - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my long-term boyfriend said that if we ever finally get married, his ex-girlfriend will definitely have to be a bridesmaid. FML

#21369466
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30272) - you deserved it (2542)

On 03/06/2015 at 6:30pm - love - by Not Engaged - United Kingdom (Dudley)

Today, after 4 years of nicely asking, I wrote an official memo to our logistics department, asking for new chairs for my subordinates. The logistics people came and concluded that there are more broken chairs than good ones, but suggested that perhaps we should all go on a diet. FML

#21372747
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25550) - you deserved it (2539)

On 03/11/2015 at 8:36pm - work - by Matei - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, after days of being too sick to leave my house, I went to get some medicine. While picking out cough drops, an old man leaned over and said, "You smell quite delicious today". I haven't showered and the only "perfume" I'm wearing is VapoRub. FML

#21374151
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27275) - you deserved it (2538)

On 03/13/2015 at 11:52pm - health - by minty - United States

Today, my boss chewed me out for leaving a work function early. I explained it was to avoid a former co-worker I constantly fought with. The boss revealed he purposely invited that former co-worker, hoping our fight would provide entertainment. FML

#21376314
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31603) - you deserved it (2536)

On 03/17/2015 at 10:54am - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I woke up this morning in a panic. Last night, I heard scratching at my door, but I thought it was just my cat and went back to sleep. This morning, it hit me that my cat is 600 miles away living with my mom in Iowa. I'm terrified to even sleep now. FML

#21370427
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31800) - you deserved it (2535)

On 03/08/2015 at 10:41am - animals - by no salt, no burning, just STFU (man) - United States

Today, I found out that the reason I didn't get the job that I have been working my butt off for over a year for is because they can't find anybody who can do my current job as good as me. I am too good to be promoted. FML

#21373611
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34256) - you deserved it (2518)

On 03/13/2015 at 2:21am - work - by hard work doesn't work - United States (Texas)

Today, I was so hungry when I finished work that I grabbed some chips to eat on the bus home. The guy who sat next to me spat in them as he left to get off. FML

#21373490
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29382) - you deserved it (2518)

On 03/12/2015 at 11:02pm - misc - by Metallurge - United Kingdom (Belfast)

Today, my neighbor at my apartment building told me water from my sink was leaking into his apartment. He told me to call maintenance to fix it, but they won't help unless he calls. He refuses to, and I can't do my dishes without feeling like an asshole. FML

#21368266
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28813) - you deserved it (2517)

On 03/04/2015 at 9:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) -



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  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

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