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September 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I had to take bus to work, because yesterday my car was hit by a bus. While standing there, I noticed the driver kept looking back at me every now and then. As I went to get off, he looks at me again and says: "Sorry..." FML

#21252700
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43573) - you deserved it (2591)

On 09/05/2014 at 10:36pm - work - by crop circle galore - United States

Today, at the restaurant where I work, a guest choked on a bone from her crosscut ribs. She asked me to bring the manager over, so I did. When he got there, she complained that the bone could have seriously injured her, and we should be more careful of where we put the bones in the ribs. FML

#21256772
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38446) - you deserved it (2541)

On 09/12/2014 at 4:05am - work - by Diachronic (man) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I caught a customer using his fat to shoplift gum out of a store. FML

#21258420
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33470) - you deserved it (2523)

On 09/14/2014 at 11:07pm - work - by nocat6 (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, it's my birthday, and everyone, family and friends, forgot. Except my dog who left me a present on my bed. FML

#21253357
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37855) - you deserved it (2515)

On 09/06/2014 at 11:06pm - animals - by Meowit (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my younger sister ran into my room, telling me someone was trying to break in. We were home alone, so she went to hide as I took a crowbar and followed the intruder. Just as I was about to swing, he turned around: it was my dad. I had to explain to my sister that burglars don't have keys. FML

#21251987
60 comments

Today, a guy told me I "kind of look like a girl" if he looked at me from the right angle. Well, I am a girl, and this is the closest thing to a compliment that I've gotten in years. FML

Today, I got up at 4.30am, like I do every morning, and got ready for work. Just as I was about to walk out the door, my flatmate jumped me and beat the snot out of me thinking I was a burglar. Because apparently burglars shower, make toast and clean up before stealing all your shit. FML

#21259933
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37549) - you deserved it (2489)

On 09/17/2014 at 8:18am - misc - by makeyourselfathome (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was mugged. I saw a cop car in the aftermath and flagged it down. Unfortunately, when the cops stopped the mugger, he said he'd been running away because I tried to mug him. Apparently the fact that he was "well-dressed" and I wasn't means he was telling the truth. FML

#21259366
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36833) - you deserved it (2490)

On 09/16/2014 at 10:34am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I got a call about a job interview, saying I was hired. I was ecstatic, until they called me back and said they'd called the wrong applicant. They called again later, saying there'd been a mistake and I really was hired. When I went in to confirm it, they said they'd never heard of me. FML

#21252552
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45334) - you deserved it (2484)

On 09/05/2014 at 6:02pm - work - by almost governmental (woman) - United Kingdom (Peterborough)

Today, my sister introduced me to her new, deaf boyfriend. She proudly proclaimed that she was trying to learn sign language for his sake, so he wouldn't have to read her lips. I'm also deaf and have been trying to get her to do the same for me for 20 goddamn years. FML

#21250726
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49281) - you deserved it (2458)

On 09/02/2014 at 7:38pm - misc - by SadAndDeaf -

Today, I flew across country to college. My luggage did not. FML

#21262400
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29418) - you deserved it (2455)

On 09/21/2014 at 11:51am - misc - by Need Clothes Now (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I found out that the only girl who's ever called me cute or handsome is actually a compulsive liar. FML

#21260295
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31183) - you deserved it (2441)

On 09/17/2014 at 9:37pm - misc - by compulsiveliarssaytheylikeme - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I started my first teaching job ever. As I was teaching, another teacher interrupted my class about 5 times because she thought it was her class. Not only did she ruin my confidence, her behavior caused my students to laugh at me. FML

#21253844
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34398) - you deserved it (2423)

On 09/07/2014 at 5:05pm - work - by teacher (woman) - United States (Armed Forces Europe, Middle East)



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  • So, have you ordered it? Have you got it? No? Yes? Do you have any idea of what I'm talking about? OK, for the normal people, I'm talking about the new iPhone 6. Apparently, it came out today. I'm not…

Friday 19 September 2014

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