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April 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my mom visited, and I left her for a few minutes while I used the bathroom. While I was stuck taking a crap, she went on one of her religious rants, telling my children that Easter was off this year because their precious "pagan" Easter Bunny had been murdered. FML

#21104621
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33641) - you deserved it (3184)

On 04/04/2014 at 6:38pm - misc - by kaheera4 (woman) - United States

Today, I got a Facebook message from a cute guy I used to work with. He admitted to liking me and when I asked why we never hung out he admitted that my dad, his boss at the time, threatened every guy I have ever worked with. FML

#21113585
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42697) - you deserved it (3183)

On 04/15/2014 at 10:01am - love - by cricha4208 - United States (Missouri)

Today, I met my girlfriend's dad at a tennis game. I could tell he despised me from the start, but it only got worse when I played him. He smashed the ball at me and I went to hit it, but I missed and fell over, tearing my arm up on the gravel. He had a smirk on his face for the rest of the day. FML

#21116561
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32184) - you deserved it (3190)

On 04/18/2014 at 6:07pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my dad had a chat with my fiancé, telling him he can do better than me, and to think carefully before going through with our wedding. FML

#21104564
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39690) - you deserved it (3171)

On 04/04/2014 at 5:31pm - love - by fuck off, dad (woman) - Colombia

Today, my little brother was feeling like the god damned bratty douchebag he is and hurled a basketball at me. It missed, hit the wall, and rebounded straight into his face. He burst into tears, and I'm now grounded because my parents believed him when he said I threw it at him. FML

#21107739
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44602) - you deserved it (3136)

On 04/08/2014 at 4:13pm - kids - by vreenya (woman) - Chile (Region Metropolitana)

Today, my grandmother is coming over to my family's house to stay for about a week or so. Apparently, the guest room window isn't big enough for her dream catcher, so she wants her cat to sleep in the guest room and she wants to sleep in my room. My parents support this. FML

#21103236
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39199) - you deserved it (3103)

On 04/02/2014 at 10:25pm - misc - by themonesterman (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I accidentally walked in on my mom cheating on my step-dad with my real dad. FML

Today, I was supervising a written exam, which took place in a really warm room. Half of the two hundred participants has probably never heard of deodorants. The other half used probably the whole can this morning. I had to stay in this inferno of stench for five hours. FML

#21103838
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35313) - you deserved it (3050)

On 04/03/2014 at 5:48pm - work - by RIP_Nose (man) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, I found out that the April Fool's Day prank my girlfriend and best friend played on me was not a joke, and that they actually did sleep together. FML

#21111038
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43738) - you deserved it (3038)

On 04/12/2014 at 12:01pm - misc - by gullible (man) - United States

Today, I used a facial mask for super sensitive skin, recommended by several friends with similar skin issues. Apparently, when the warning says, "May cause some slight redness for thirty minutes", it really means, "Your face will have hives and swell to twice its normal size for several hours." FML

#21119632
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27695) - you deserved it (3031)

On 04/22/2014 at 1:31am - health - by Tomatoe Face - United States (Tennessee)

Today, when I went to the shopping centre, the automatic door wouldn't open for me. I had to stand there and wait until someone else walked by to open it for me. I suffer from dwarfism and this is a daily occurrence. FML

#21118654
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40860) - you deserved it (3000)

On 04/21/2014 at 12:11am - misc - by shorty (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was dismissed from my job at an unemployment agency. In order to receive financial support from the government I need to be cooperating with a job service provider. They paired me up with the same place I was just fired from. FML

#21101310
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36837) - you deserved it (2990)

On 03/31/2014 at 8:43pm - misc - by awks - Australia (Victoria)

Today, while reading the paper I saw a picture of a guy I really like that I met online. The picture is in the obituaries. No wonder he hasn't called. FML

#21103818
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42012) - you deserved it (2977)

On 04/03/2014 at 5:22pm - love - by kubbyp (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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