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October 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my brother and I were talking about Ebola, when he says he would love to have the disease because of how famous it would make him. Plus, his college essays about him "fighting through the disease" would be "phenomenal". FML

#21278125
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33666) - you deserved it (3018)

On 10/15/2014 at 12:55am - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I woke up to a mouse sitting on my pillow and chewing on my hair. FML

#21271220
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35191) - you deserved it (3007)

On 10/05/2014 at 1:04pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I went to my grandma's yard sale, only to find my baby pictures being sold for 25 cents each. FML

#21275511
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38514) - you deserved it (2977)

On 10/11/2014 at 10:43am - misc - by Forge (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, while out for dinner with my parents, a woman, approximately the same age as my mother, repeatedly propositioned me for sex during the course of my meal. After declining firmly several times, she only stopped after my mother convinced her I was gay. FML

#21279658
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33738) - you deserved it (2992)

On 10/17/2014 at 6:13am - intimacy - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I dressed up in my nicest clothes and spent ages putting makeup on before going to a nightclub, hoping to meet someone nice. The only person who acknowledged me was a guy who yelled, "Hey, wanna fuck?! Not like anyone else would ever touch you, am I right?!" FML

#21283051
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24948) - you deserved it (2994)

On 10/22/2014 at 11:06am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Mexico (Nuevo Leon)

Today, my dad told me someday I'll find a man who wants a nice lumberjack for a wife. FML

#21279635
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29896) - you deserved it (2958)

On 10/17/2014 at 4:14am - love - by axewoman -

Today, my friends and I went paintballing. The instructor showed us the sound of an unloaded gun by shooting at my face. It wasn't unloaded. FML

#21277056
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42821) - you deserved it (2951)

On 10/13/2014 at 5:33pm - health - by clumsylobster - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my father described me as "the sort of sucker women marry then cheat on all the time." My mother agreed with him. FML

#21279077
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31865) - you deserved it (2950)

On 10/16/2014 at 1:07pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, my sister ended her long and extremely annoying crush on Justin Bieber. I can only hope one day my girlfriend will end hers too. FML

#21282066
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26824) - you deserved it (2981)

On 10/20/2014 at 10:29pm - love - by DanTheMan (man) -

Today, I confronted my girlfriend after catching her cheating on me. After she finished crying, she had the brass balls to say she'd understand if I needed a couple of weeks to forgive her, and asked me for bus fare so she could go tell the other guy they could only be friends now. FML

#21280490
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34508) - you deserved it (2939)

On 10/18/2014 at 2:44pm - love - by yee-whore (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I woke up to find that my acne has lined itself beautifully in a perfect 'L' shape in the centre of my forehead. FML

Today, I got called to the guidance office, only to be told my boyfriend broke up with me. He wasn't sure how to break the news to me, so he made my guidance counselor do it for him. FML

#21277708
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40743) - you deserved it (2923)

On 10/14/2014 at 2:57pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I got my first compliment in over a year. It was from my gynecologist, saying I have a beautiful cervix. FML

#21275026
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32158) - you deserved it (2920)

On 10/10/2014 at 3:12pm - misc - by JulietMarie - United States (New York)



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  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

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