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October 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Yesterday, my boss brought her cat to work. At one point, I looked up and everyone was staring at me staring at the cat's asshole. FML

#20915004
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33047) - you deserved it (14276)

On 10/10/2013 at 10:11am - animals - by failure (man) - Korea, Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi)

Today, my 19-year-old, looool long-distance boyfriend told me he wouldn't be able to text me all day because it's too hard to typehile in his Spider-Man suit . It's non-negotiable . FML

#20940116
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36601) - you deserved it (14249)

On 10/31/2013 at 10:30am - love - by AML (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, boyfriend came onto me in a romantic gesture. We endd up having sex, forgetting that the window repair guy was supposd to come today an do some work on our third floor apartment windows. I still don't know how much he saw. FML

#20939175
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45038) - you deserved it (14072)

On 10/30/2013 at 3:17pm - intimacy - by English_Nut117 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend called me a selfish bitch and dumped me after I told him I'm planning on getting much-needed breast reduction surgery . FML

#20903440
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57573) - you deserved it (13991)

On 10/01/2013 at 3:41pm - intimacy - by Ggirl (woman) - United States (California)

TODAY, MY MOTHER CAME OVER TO MY APARTMENT FIR A SURPRISE VISIT. IT WASN'T UNTIL AFTER SHE LEFT THAT I REALIZED THAT I LEFT A HALF EMPTY BOTTLE OF ADULT TOY CLEANER ON THE COUNTER IN THE BATHROOM.

Today, I Fell Asleep While Boyfriend And I Were Having Sex. What's Worse Is That He Didn't Even Notice. FML

#20910165
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49761) - you deserved it (13349)

On 10/06/2013 at 9:34pm - intimacy - by Sleepy head - United States

Yesterday, I was cuddling my new boyfriend,hen he went in to kiss me 4 the frst time. Sadly, I reflexively kneed him in the balls. FML

#20917814
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40913) - you deserved it (13138)

On 10/12/2013 at 4:28pm - love - by fuck.jpg.bmp.gif.rar.zip.shit (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today , I rushed to a dentist's appointment . Once in the chair , I apologized fir not having had the time to brush mah teeth beforehand . He responded with , "Ah that's alright , I just took a piss and forgot to wash mah hands." FML

#20937985
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45923) - you deserved it (12457)

On 10/29/2013 at 2:57pm - health - by Anonymous - Zimbabwe

Today, in revenge 4 me pulling te old salt-in-te-soda prank on im, my dad sowd up at my college dressd in a tigt blouse and miniskirt, demanding tat I come ome early wit im. I tink I'm going to be lyncd next time I go to class. FML

#20919140
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36528) - you deserved it (12322)

On 10/13/2013 at 5:20pm - misc - by HSampsON (man) - Niger (Niamey)

my best friend went in 4 her scheduled mammogram, and I sent her a text saying, "How're your boobies?" It was only after I sent it that I realized I'd sent it to my history professor. FML

#20930198
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40074) - you deserved it (11926)

On 10/22/2013 at 12:47pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I tried Ambien 4 the frst time. I now have to apologize to most of my exes 4 excessively rambling emails about getting together 4 some naked Twister.

#20929399
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31635) - you deserved it (10644)

On 10/21/2013 at 8:12pm - health - by OutOfMyMind (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, after almost 2 days, I finally fell asleep, during husband's vows, on our wedding day, in front of 250 guests. FML

#20917263
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46253) - you deserved it (10574)

On 10/12/2013 at 3:23am - love - by angryinlaws (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

TODAY, MY SEX-CRAZD EX WROTE ME A LETTER SO BAD, IT HAUNTS ME THAT I LET A GUY WITH SUCH TERRIBLE GRAMMAR SKILLS TOUCH MY BOOBS. BIG FAT FML

#20903082
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42376) - you deserved it (10465)

On 10/01/2013 at 6:47am - intimacy - by whatdoesitmatter (woman) - India (Tamil Nadu)



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