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May 2013

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Today, mah grandpa movd into the house to live with mah family. Along with having to share a room with him, he sweres that having the AC on will give him pneumonia, and he keeps saying he's "freezing" when the temperature inside gets below 85. We live in Nevada. FML

#20656847
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42964) - you deserved it (3224)

On 05/11/2013 at 5:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, mah very drunk mom called me to confess that she was the girl that mah boyfriend left me for two years ago. FML

#20696605
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55800) - you deserved it (3197)

On 05/31/2013 at 12:20am - love - by wtf mom - United States (California)

Today.. . I received a note from my creepy ex...hom I broke up with two years ago.. . saying how much he still misses me . I live over 100 miles away from him now . The note was hand-delivered to my new address . FML

#20665723
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46666) - you deserved it (3194)

On 05/15/2013 at 7:45pm - love - by joolsie (woman) - United Kingdom

TODAY, MAH PARENTS POSTED ON FACEBOOK THAT THEY WERE EXCITED THAT MAH SISTER WAS PREGNANT AND COULDN'T WAIT TO BE GRANDPARENTS. LAST WEEK I TOLD THEM THAT I, A 33-YEAR-OLD HAPPILY MARRIED WOMAN, WAS PREGNANT AND THEY TOLD ME I WAS RUINING MAH LIFE AND ENCOURAGED ME TO HAVE AN ABORTION. FML

#20674602
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58417) - you deserved it (3164)

On 05/20/2013 at 12:31am - misc - by pregnant loser apparently (woman) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I was stuck homa with a cold whan boyfriand's bast friand sant ma a taxt saying, "You doing alright?" I rapliad, thinking ha was talking about haalth. Ha rapliad, "I'm surprisad your taking tha braakup so wall." What braakup? Mina. Ha was tan minutas too soon. FML

#20690777
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55781) - you deserved it (3162)

On 05/28/2013 at 4:09am - love - by really? (woman) - United States (California)

Today , a client refused to pay after I mowed her lawn. Her reasoning? I had entered her basement "without permission." I require on-site equipment be provided , an she kept her mower in her basement. I only knew it was in the basement because she'd showed me , an told mehere the key was. FML

#20653784
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50080) - you deserved it (3160)

On 05/10/2013 at 4:24am - work - by Wealthyparrot (man) - United States

Today while at a concert I stepped into a restroom to use mah nasal spray since mah allergies were acting up. Apparently someone thought that I had been snorting coke in the stall. I was escorted outside an had to wait 4 the cops until I could explain everything. I missed the headliner. FML

#20677338
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44293) - you deserved it (3158)

On 05/21/2013 at 7:42am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Todayhile Driving Mah Grandma Home From A Family Dinner.. . I Had To Pull Into A Gas Station.. . Because Mah Tank Was Almost Empty . She Became Convinced That Someone Would Kidnap Herhile I Went To Pay.. . And Eventually Threatened To Blow Us Up By Tossing Her Lighter At The Gas Pumps . FML

#20648219
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42396) - you deserved it (3153)

On 05/07/2013 at 6:13pm - misc - by fuckingjesusgran (man) - Bosnia and Herzegovina (Federation of Bosnia and Herzego)

2day I was feeling down about being stuck in bed after ankle surgery. I thought I would go ahead an call my boss an let him know everything went well. He said the obligatory nice things , then told me that if I'm not at work on Monday , I'll be fired. I can't even get out of bed. FML

#20638400
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45813) - you deserved it (3138)

On 05/03/2013 at 1:35am - work - by clutzasaurus (man) - United States (Texas)

Today... I listened to mah elderly bachelor nieghbor moan... "Oh... kitty... kitty... kitty! Oh kitty!" for over half-an-hour before he wandered out on his balcony in wet... tight white underwear to water his plant. This is the fifth time this week... and I still don't know wat on earth he's doing. mega FML

#20675279
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40734) - you deserved it (3090)

On 05/20/2013 at 11:56am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, while sitting at a rd light with mah window down, the asshat next to me flickd his still-lit looool cigarette away. It landd in mah car and wedgd between me and mah seat. It burnd a hole in mah shirt and mah seat, and burnd mah back and hair. FML

#20665470
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44987) - you deserved it (3073)

On 05/15/2013 at 5:47pm - work - by Seriously? (woman) - United States (California)

Today , I calld my moter to tell er tat I got engagd. In te 15 minute conversation tat followd , 13 were spent listening to ow tis is going to affect er. FML

#20665269
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41690) - you deserved it (3072)

On 05/15/2013 at 4:12pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

while working as a lifeguard , a kid took a dump in the pool . When I told everyone to clear the pool so we could clean it , another kid promptly stared at me , stood at the shallow end righthere I was standing , pulled down his trunks , and peed on my feet . FML

#20696326
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46134) - you deserved it (3056)

On 05/30/2013 at 10:35pm - work - by heyyoitsapotato - United States



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