Today, I kissed my gorgeous new boyfriend for the first time. I ran my hands through his hair; a multitude of dandruff rained out and five lice crawled onto my hand. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42703) - you deserved it (5785)
On 03/22/2013 at 1:28am - love - by eww. (woman) - Australia
Today, while at my boyfriend's house, I needed to use the bathroom. I decided to be a good girlfriend and leave the seat up for him. He later yelled at me for not putting the seat down because he needed to take a dump. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27192) - you deserved it (5766)
On 03/24/2013 at 3:35am - love - by whatchagonnado - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I finally came out to my family as a lesbian. My grandma then told me I'm just going through a phase because I finally realized I'm not pretty or skinny enough to get a man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33439) - you deserved it (5743)
Today, I awoke to my husband talking to someone on the phone at 2am. I heard him say, "Baby you're making me hard." Immediately, I asked him who he was talking to. His response? "It's Jake, from State Farm." FML
I agree, your life sucks (59652) - you deserved it (5741)
On 03/27/2013 at 7:55pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Hawaii)
Today, I have the flu. I had to wash the dishes, cook dinner, take out the trash, and take care of the laundry, all while my wife sat around watching TV, because she was "too tired". I work 8 hours a day. She's a college student. She doesn't see what's so unfair about this. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31322) - you deserved it (5682)
On 03/16/2013 at 2:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, I saw a woman breastfeeding at the natural foods market. It's the first time I've seen a woman's nipple in over two years. I've been married for ten. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45540) - you deserved it (5614)
On 03/10/2013 at 12:13pm - intimacy - by themouseman1212 - United States
Today, I realized how badly medical education has ruined me when I couldn't enjoy erotic literature because of one subtle anatomy mistake the author made. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26977) - you deserved it (5613)
On 03/29/2013 at 10:19am - intimacy - by notagyno - Romania (Bucuresti)
Today, I was so bored at a dinner party that I went to the bathroom to play games on my phone. One of my co-workers came in, so I rushed into a stall, but forgot to turn my phone's sound off. She heard it and said, "It's OK, music helps me shit too" and started blasting her music and grunting. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23031) - you deserved it (5590)
On 03/06/2013 at 9:39pm - work - by shittysongs - United States (Washington)
Today, I got dumped during sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52484) - you deserved it (5509)
On 03/28/2013 at 6:02am - intimacy - by Bigfatfailure (man) - United States (California)
Today, I finally got the courage to confess my feelings to the guy I have loved for a year now in a long note. He called half an hour later and said, "I'm not going to read this crap, just tell me what it says". FML
I agree, your life sucks (25611) - you deserved it (5302)
On 03/07/2013 at 10:53pm - love - by hoolabaloo (woman) - India (Gujarat)
Today, I told my family I was divorcing my husband. My little sister asked if "we can keep him instead". FML
I agree, your life sucks (26945) - you deserved it (5248)
On 03/16/2013 at 11:51am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nebraska)
Today, my boyfriend informed me that from now on during sex, I have to be on top at all times, saying I need the exercise more than him. As offensive as this was, I was actually happy because he's crap on top. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34334) - you deserved it (5245)
On 03/18/2013 at 10:36am - intimacy - by Ann (woman) - United States
Today, while on a crowded public bus, a cute girl asked if she could sit next to me. Problem is, I didn't hear correctly and thought she asked if anyone was sitting next to me. I answered no, causing her to walk off angrily and earning me several disgusted stares from other passengers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27494) - you deserved it (5231)
On 03/04/2013 at 9:23am - misc - by Anonymous - Taiwan (T'ai-pei)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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