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March 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my boss and I had to come up with a code to call if a person acts inappropriately towards me because I "attract too many weirdos." FML

#20529995
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30238) - you deserved it (3071)

On 03/03/2013 at 8:17pm - work - by smokeysarah94 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while working in childcare, we went to a farm so the kids could see how things worked. They started showing off prize winning cattle and when they bought out "Miss Stacey", the kids lost their shit. My name is Miss Stacey. FML

#20550321
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34711) - you deserved it (3063)

On 03/19/2013 at 1:00am - work - by seriously! - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, after months of my doctor telling me that my heart palpitations are simply due to anxiety, and that I'm perfectly healthy, I decided to weight train to face my fears. Two hours later, I was in the emergency room. FML

#20527472
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28801) - you deserved it (3017)

On 03/01/2013 at 10:17pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Iowa)

Today, at college, I finally talked myself into confessing my feelings to a girl I really like. Her response was to threaten to sue me. For what, exactly? I have no goddamned idea. I just don't understand people anymore. FML

#20545151
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33706) - you deserved it (3000)

On 03/15/2013 at 6:43pm - love - by forever single, I guess (man) - United States

Today, I announced to my family that I got accepted into Harvard. My grandma laughed and muttered, "Liar." FML

#20567796
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39679) - you deserved it (2995)

On 03/31/2013 at 1:10am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went to a paintball match with a group of friends, one of whom brought his dad along. His dad is a weight-lifting, wannabe alpha male fucknut who thinks that chokeslamming opponents is a legitimate close-quarters paintball tactic. My broken shoulder disagrees. FML

#20528184
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38673) - you deserved it (2968)

On 03/02/2013 at 1:59pm - health - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I was at the library doing research for my midterm. All of the computers were in use, so I decided to use my laptop instead. Ten minutes later, I was confronted and kicked out. My offense? Unauthorized use of the library's so-called "Free Public WiFi". FML

#20540861
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37290) - you deserved it (2967)

On 03/12/2013 at 3:03pm - misc - by PhailedMidterm (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found out my boyfriend has been cheating on me for months. It all started while I was in the hospital, he says, because we were supposed to go out that day, but then I "had to go and get sick". He blames my emergency surgery for his infidelity. FML

#20547926
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40124) - you deserved it (2962)

On 03/17/2013 at 4:12pm - love - by need an appendickectomy (woman) - Finland

Today, my boyfriend tried to whimsically serenade me by throwing rocks at my apartment window and singing. He got the wrong window. Another guy answered, and now he thinks I'm cheating on him. FML

#20559286
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36992) - you deserved it (2933)

On 03/25/2013 at 10:48am - love - by Faaccckkk (woman) - United States

Today, I was walking through my town when a man on a bicycle rolled up to me and said, "I don't mean this offensively but you're really well-built." I don't know whether he was commenting on my height or comparing me to a shed, but my mother won't stop laughing. FML

#20531997
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24918) - you deserved it (2929)

On 03/05/2013 at 7:20am - misc - by apparently-a-shed (woman) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, a guy left flowers on my doorstep. I got home to find my dad claiming he bought them for my mum. I told my parents they were mine, they laughed in my face. FML

#20551968
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35800) - you deserved it (2928)

On 03/20/2013 at 6:59am - love - by lp525252 (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I noticed my dog chewing on something while on the couch. It looked like a wash rag of some sort, so I grabbed it from my dog. It wasn't until after I picked it up that I noticed it wasn't a wash rag. It was a small, dead bird. FML

#20527319
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28215) - you deserved it (2920)

On 03/01/2013 at 7:54pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I took my daughter on her first visit to the zoo. While we were watching the lemurs, some kid thought it would be funny to start shouting "MONKEY CUNTS" at them at the top of his voice. Now my daughter refuses to stop repeating the same phrase. FML

#20540639
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32556) - you deserved it (2908)

On 03/12/2013 at 10:05am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)



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