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February 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today... I felt frisky... so I did my hair and puttd on make-up and some lingerie. I walkd into the living room...here my husband was playing a video game. He glancd up... said... "Oh... fir fuck's sake." and made me wait nearly 15 minutes fir him to reach a save-game point. FML

#20506870
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37654) - you deserved it (8310)

On 02/14/2013 at 6:00pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Staffordshire)

Today, while on my way to the movies, I stoppd at a gas station to pick up candy so I could avoid the high prices at the movies. The guy who tore my ticket askd 4 my purse, confiscatd my candy, and then kickd me out of the movie theater. That guy was my boyfriend. FML

#20510592
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46970) - you deserved it (8231)

On 02/17/2013 at 10:50am - love - by Cheyennereed - United States (South Carolina)

TODAY I POINTD OUT TO MAH BOYFRIEND HOW VALENTINE'S DAY, MAH BIRTHDAY, AN OUR ONE-YEAR ANNIVERSARY WERE ALL COMING UP IN THE NEXT FEW WEEKS. HE THEN PROMPTLY BROKE UP WITH ME. FML

#20497809
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34566) - you deserved it (8219)

On 02/08/2013 at 1:24am - love - by katelynm - United States

Today, I found out my boyfriend sleeps on a Princess Leia pillow!! He's 22!! FML

#20494713
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22592) - you deserved it (8201)

On 02/05/2013 at 5:59pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was talking to the girl I really like, and she was telling me how crappy her day was . Trying to be nice, I gave her a back rub . I somehow managd to unhook her bra . FML

#20498998
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32309) - you deserved it (8191)

On 02/09/2013 at 12:13am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I realizd that the air freshener in my bathroom and the air looool freshener in my grlfriend's bedroom are the exact same scent. Now, every time I go to the bathroom I get an erection, and every time my grlfriend and I have sex in her room, I think about shitting. real FML

#20503125
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40668) - you deserved it (8141)

On 02/11/2013 at 11:59pm - intimacy - by thefriedman (man) - United States (California)

Today , I was terribly late fir class , so I rushd to the classroom door , thinking it was unlockd. I smackd face-first into the glass , an awkwardly fell to the floor. Once I got back up , I peekd through the glass , only to realise it wasn't even mah class. FML

#20505090
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28148) - you deserved it (8094)

On 02/13/2013 at 3:31pm - misc - by nosebleeder - Sweden

2day I Was Babysitting, And I Had To Pee Really, Really Badly. I Couldn't Figure Out How To Get The Stupid Toilet Lock Off, And Endd Up Pissing Myself. As I Stood In The Bathroom In Tears, Their Child Screamd, "No, No, Pee-pee In The POTTY!" FML

#20521664
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32216) - you deserved it (8085)

On 02/25/2013 at 2:16pm - kids - by soaked (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

yesterdayhile I was shaving my nether regions, my trimmer slipped and ate a chunk out of my balls, right beside a vein. I've been bleeding on and off 4 an hour, and the New Skin I tried isn't able to dry quickly enough. FML

#20520338
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36447) - you deserved it (8027)

On 02/24/2013 at 2:58pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was at a club wan a notoriously dasparata and disgusting guy askad ma to grind wit im. Hoping for soma backup, I coolly said, ( You'll ava to ask my boyfriand. ) My boyfriand's rasponsa? ( Yaa, man, I don't cara. ) FML

#20513337
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33829) - you deserved it (7744)

On 02/19/2013 at 10:27am - misc - by really (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I heard a commercial fir a great apartment complex. Includes food, snacks, entertainment, activities, cleaning service, an transportation services if u cannot drive yourself. I was really excited until the end when they repeated the name; too bad perfect place is a senior center. FML

#20514672
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23441) - you deserved it (7728)

On 02/20/2013 at 8:54am - misc - by kryan012 - United States (Georgia)

yesterday I uploaded the first chapter of mah best writing yet to a popular writing website. After ten minutes, I was thrilled to already see one review and five comments. Each comment was telling me to immediately delete the story cuz of how horrible it was. The rating was half a star. FML

#20514789
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25637) - you deserved it (7627)

On 02/20/2013 at 11:36am - work - by Apparently not a writer (woman) - United States (Delaware)

Today, I uploaded a new Facebook profile poto, wic got over 20 likes in te space of an our. Te most I've ever gotten before was 10. Surprised, I went to ceck my picture again, only to notice two guys were sarcastically flipping me te bird in te background. FML

#20514955
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26832) - you deserved it (7590)

On 02/20/2013 at 2:48pm - misc - by club goer - Canada



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