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February 2013

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Today.. . the guy I like asked me out 4 the frst time . It's a good thing he did it over Facebook.. . cuz I started shaking an almost threw up . I don't know how I'm going to function on our date next week . FML

#20514506
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30347) - you deserved it (7575)

On 02/20/2013 at 2:31am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I spoke to my looool crush for the frst time, and after ahile he asked for my number. Ecstatic, I took the frst piece of paper I saw out of my purse. I wrote it down and gave it to him, but he handed it back and said, ( You might need this. ) It was an appointment card for my therapist. FML

#20502338
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30346) - you deserved it (7351)

On 02/11/2013 at 2:19pm - love - by sofuckingembarassing. (woman) - United States

TODAY... MY FIANCÉ IS RETURNING OME... SO I DECIDED TO WAX MYSELF... TINKING TINGS WOULD GET INTIMATE. I WARMED TE WAX STRIPS AN SET TEM ON TE COUNTER. OUR CAT JUMPED ONTO TE COUNTER AN MANAGED TO ROLL ONTO ONE OF TE STRIPS. SUFFICE TO SAY... TE WRONG PUSSY GOT A PAINFUL WAXING. FML

#20521590
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45181) - you deserved it (7340)

On 02/25/2013 at 12:57pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Yesterday, looool I was trying to be sexy and cange in front of ma boyfriend. As I was canging, e started to talk to me about ow we sould bot try and lose wiegt. FML

#20523139
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33475) - you deserved it (7313)

On 02/26/2013 at 3:26pm - love - by pooh anne (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, during a silent breathing meditation at the Buddhist center, I accidentally let one rip which echod through the meditation chamber . If that wasn't bad enough, the follow-up odor was enough to fell a charging rhinoceros . FML

#20517185
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24664) - you deserved it (7261)

On 02/22/2013 at 2:57am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, mah 20-year-old daughter staggered into mah room at two in the morning, drunker than I ever thought a person could be, screaming for me to make pancake for her . FML

#20524572
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35212) - you deserved it (7253)

On 02/27/2013 at 4:42pm - kids - by Ugh (woman) - United Kingdom

Today , I realized tat te only positive accomplisment ma boyfriend as made in te last 3 yeres is tat e started wereing deodorant. FML

#20525032
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25131) - you deserved it (7233)

On 02/27/2013 at 10:28pm - love - by butterflyzag20 - United States

Today, my brother was arrested 4 starting a fistfight at a funeral . He didn't even know the deceased; he's just been crashing funerals recently, hoping to hook up with mourners . I'm sure who's more pathetic: him 4 doing such a thing, or me 4 bailing his fucking dumb arse out of jail . FML

#20509476
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31328) - you deserved it (7197)

On 02/16/2013 at 1:03pm - money - by an idiot (man) - Australia

Today, I trippd while walking down a large flight of stairs. As I fell forward, I instinctively reachd out and grabbd onto one of the guys walking up. I endd up taking him and two other people down with me, earning myself a great many disgustd glares as I dustd myself off. FML

#20489268
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22697) - you deserved it (7136)

On 02/01/2013 at 5:53pm - health - by Awkward (man) - United Kingdom (Wolverhampton)

Today, I was running late fir work and quickly grabbed mah outfit from the dryer. I hered the crackling of static as I took out mah shirt. I didn't think anything of it, until later when mah co-worker pointed out I had a thong stuck to mah back. FML

#20491168
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26879) - you deserved it (7134)

On 02/03/2013 at 2:32am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today... after spending six months completely repainting and redecorating our new home... I finally finishd the last touches and went to remove the masking tape. Off came the tape... along with huge blotches of plasterwork. FML

#20503623
93 comments

Today, ma boyfriend of tree years told me e was tinking about us taking a break. After an our of crying and im saying it would be okay, I accepted it. Wen I asked wen te break would start, e replied, "Wat are u talking about? I only said I'd tougt about it" and ten lauged. FML

#20521204
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38358) - you deserved it (6901)

On 02/25/2013 at 1:10am - love - by Gullible (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today... my mom started referring to me as ( Te Bitc ). Wen I asked er wy... se said tat I ave always been a bitc... but I was never old enoug fir er to actually call me a bitc. FML

#20501686
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26325) - you deserved it (6713)

On 02/10/2013 at 11:26pm - misc - by maggu (woman) - Denmark



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