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February 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I bought a fish. I put the tank on top of the fridge so my cat wouldn't get at it. I'd forgotten to buy some things for its tank, so I quickly ran out to get them. When I got home, I saw the tank destroyed on the floor, and my cat devouring my fish. I had the fish for less than an hour. FML

#20497647
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14708) - you deserved it (23756)

On 02/07/2013 at 10:58pm - animals - by fish killer - Canada

Today, I had to convince my dad that text lingo causes brain damage just to try to get him to stop. He actually believed me, and is telling everyone they have, or will receive brain damage soon. FML

#20504918
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9905) - you deserved it (23498)

On 02/13/2013 at 11:45am - misc - by oh my dad - United States (Kentucky)

Today, at work I got in an elevator to go upstairs. It wasn't until the doors opened minutes later and people stepped in that I realized I had zoned out and forgot to press the button for the floor I needed. I then promptly exited the elevator and waited for the next elevator to go up in. FML

#20513703
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8055) - you deserved it (21885)

On 02/19/2013 at 5:03pm - work - by CaBur (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend asked me if she looked fat in her new pair of jeans. Knowing I was probably about two seconds away from all hell breaking loose, I instinctively tried to save my game, before remembering I wasn't playing a video game. I really need to get a life. FML

#20491836
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8800) - you deserved it (19679)

On 02/03/2013 at 4:57pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia

Today, I realized that the homeless people I give change to all dress better than I do, including the one that doesn't believe in pants. FML

#20522911
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11345) - you deserved it (19257)

On 02/26/2013 at 10:54am - misc - by keerow (man) - United States

Today, I got so lonely I decided to make sock puppets and play with them. I played for four hours straight, only to be interrupted by a phone call. I didn't answer because my sock puppets were "on a date" and I didn't want to stop playing. FML

#20489987
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28365) - you deserved it (18419)

On 02/02/2013 at 7:08am - misc - by ineedalife (woman) - Australia

Today, I was riding my bike, when I saw a large dog sitting in front of a house. I started to really crank the pedals, figuring that by the time it saw me, I'd be long gone. My chain popped off, I lost control and crashed onto the side of the road. The dog hadn't moved. It was a statue. FML

#20510258
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20962) - you deserved it (18131)

On 02/17/2013 at 1:01am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my manager asked me for the password to my Internet so she could Skype family since she can't pay her bill. This is the same woman who just a week ago tried to evict me because my rent was an hour late. Trying to be the bigger person, I gave her the password. She changed my password. FML

#20496640
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28838) - you deserved it (15577)

On 02/07/2013 at 1:20am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I was in bed when I rolled over and saw a hand right beside my head. I freaked out and nearly peed myself, just to realize that it was the huggable heart pillow my boyfriend had given to me on Valentine's Day. FML

#20524057
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9690) - you deserved it (14584)

On 02/27/2013 at 2:59am - misc - by girlymae (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I got my results on a recent, important midterm. During the exam, I'd noticed my instructor had accidentally left an answers page in the test packet, so being honest, I didn't look at them. It turns out she did it on purpose to help us pass. I failed. FML

#20515105
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32113) - you deserved it (13216)

On 02/20/2013 at 4:52pm - misc - by its ok to cheat!? - United States (California)

Today, after having lost my phone three days ago, I paid a $150 non-refundable fee to have my phone replaced and mailed to me by Tuesday. A half hour later, I found my original phone. FML

#20491153
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20785) - you deserved it (13122)

On 02/03/2013 at 2:14am - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I hired out a motel room so I could stay there by myself and lie to my mother and grandmother about having friends. This is the third time. FML

#20492687
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28601) - you deserved it (13094)

On 02/04/2013 at 2:45am - love - by lonelyloser - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I realized that without my birth control pills, I would have no idea what day it is. FML

#20507998
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18800) - you deserved it (12973)

On 02/15/2013 at 8:57am - health - by PurpleSloth (woman) - United States (California)



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