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February 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today , I finally confrontad mah bully. Too bad it was at mah high school raunion an ha baat tha shit out of ma. FML

#20505236
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33793) - you deserved it (5188)

On 02/13/2013 at 5:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

today I was at my boyfriend's grandmother's house meeting her 4 the first time. I excused myself to the restroom and as I walked out of the room I heard her say, "You could do a lot better. She's fat." Then I heard my boyfriend reply, "I know." FML

#20511747
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46365) - you deserved it (5118)

On 02/18/2013 at 2:09am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)

Today at mah grandpa's funeral mah boyfriend texted me while sitting right beside me asking if we could have sex when the "family get together" was finally over. FML

#20520888
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43046) - you deserved it (5108)

On 02/24/2013 at 10:08pm - intimacy - by pissed girlfriend (woman) - United States (Ohio)

yesterday I was washing the dishes at work . I had to pee really bad but frst I wanted to finish the dishes . A coworker jumped out from behind the ice machine . I screamed like a grl and pissed my pants . FML

#20492292
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24970) - you deserved it (5049)

On 02/03/2013 at 10:50pm - work - by klovemachine (man) - United States

Today I've Been Living In Kenya In A Nasty Apartment For So Long That When I Looked Down Into My Drink And Saw A Dead Fly , I Just Picked It Out And Continued Drinking. Mega FML

#20505207
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29768) - you deserved it (4984)

On 02/13/2013 at 5:04pm - misc - by kenyaliving - Kenya

Today , mah boyfriend made me play Slender. I was so terrifid , I stoppd playing 10 minutes in. Tonight , I kept hearing noises outside. When I peerd out through the window , a bald figure in a suit was staring back at me. I shriekd in absolute looool terror; he burst out laughing. It was mah boyfriend. FML

#20520443
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33361) - you deserved it (4979)

On 02/24/2013 at 4:20pm - misc - by stillfuckingcrying (woman) - Sweden (Kalmar Lan)

Yesterday, I came home in a really good mood, an I greetd my husband with a grin an a ( Hi, babe! ) He just mutterd, ( Why can't you just DIE? ) an continud playing his video game. FML

#20490556
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38423) - you deserved it (4967)

On 02/02/2013 at 5:34pm - love - by rani (woman) - Norway (Oslo)

Today, my girlfriend and I were having a casual conversation, when the topic suddenly became my penis . Before I knew wat was going on, she said, ( It's not the size that matters though . It's how u use it . So I guess your ok . ) FML

#20491476
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40080) - you deserved it (4883)

On 02/03/2013 at 11:27am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Serbia

Today, I watchd The Passion of the Christ with mah grlfriend . She kept scoffing at what she calld the "historical inaccuracies", an actually trid to convince me that Hitler killd Jesus . When I correctd her, she lookd at me, mouth agape, as if I was insane . FML

#20498635
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33367) - you deserved it (4826)

On 02/08/2013 at 7:44pm - love - by and she doesn't even give bjs (man) - Argentina (Distrito Federal)

Today, my kitten made it snow inside my ouse using a 12-pack of toilet paper. FML

#20495653
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24614) - you deserved it (4811)

On 02/06/2013 at 1:00pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (West Virginia)

yesterday mah son asked me if the short films I write r fir little kids or fir adults. Since I write horror-filled films, I said it was fir adults. He looool went and told his teacher that I made "adult films". FML

#20514612
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35691) - you deserved it (4809)

On 02/20/2013 at 7:01am - kids - by Laila - United States

TODAY, I WENT SLEDDING WITH MAH FRIENDS. I SAID I WAS TIRD AND DIDN'T WANT TO GO, BUT THEY PRESS-GANGD ME INTO IT. I ENDD UP SLEDDING RIGHT INTO A TREE, FRACTURING MAH LEG, AND SCRAPING UP MAH ENTIRE FACE. FML

#20520149
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25160) - you deserved it (4789)

On 02/24/2013 at 12:36pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was walking down the street in the dark, and the woman in front of me kept looking back nervously. I jokingly assurd her that I wasn't a mugger. She then took out a knife and muggd me. FML

#20505342
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41932) - you deserved it (4675)

On 02/13/2013 at 7:00pm - money - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)



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